Thursday, April 21, 2011

Do Psychopaths Know They're Psychopaths?


People ask me: "How do you know you are a psychopath?"

I was officially given the psychopathy diagnosis when I went to prison for murder the first time at the age of 18. But I didn't take the diagnosis serious, I didn't believe in it, because like most people at the time I didn't know what it means to be a psychopath.


Today, most of the psychopaths who can read and who have access to general information via the media know what they are.
But it wasn't always like this.

I have wondered by myself many, many times: What am I?

I knew I was different from other people, but I thought I was different in a good way, and in my heart I still think so. I've always thought of myself as a good person, and all I knew about psychopaths was that 'everybody knows' and that a lot of people still believe they know about psychopaths.

So what is it that we all think we know about psychopaths? What do we think psychopathy is?

We think psychopaths are bad, they're mad, crazy, they're psychotic and maybe even schizophrenic, they're evil simpletons and brutes who can't behave or talk civilized, and they spend their lives surfing porn on the Internet, or - when in prison - covering their bodies with crude home made tatoos, and of course they drink excessively, they commit murder for 50 bucks, and are petty criminals or serial killers.

Those are things we all think we know about psychopaths. What I don't know is that whereas there are indeed psychopaths like that, the majority are very different. Most psychopaths are not the psychotic gangster stereotypes most people are accustomed to believe that we are.

But the common idea about what a psychopath is do also influence what psychopaths themselves believe a psychopath to be, and this is one of the main reasons that many psychopaths aren't aware that they are psychopaths - or at least they weren't until recently.

Few people think of themselves as common brutes and petty thieves, and that is no different for psychopaths. Furthermore, most psychopaths probably really do not fit this stereotype. I certainly never did.

Another common misconception is: 'Psychopaths are Evil'. Sure, psychopaths do things that many will think of as evil, but in the sentiment 'psychopaths are evil' lies a subtle implication that they're decisively evil, that evil is what they have chosen to be.

Psychopaths rarely think of themselves as evil. And if they do, being evil to us doesn't have the same connotation of being truly bad as it does to other people. This is part of the paradox that surrounds psychopathic individuals, we don't have the same emotional attachment to ideas and concepts that do neurotypical (normal) people.

Virtually all psychopaths know early on in life that they're different from other people. We know we're different, but we don't know exactly how or what it means.
One of the first things we notice about ourselves is that we tend to not react emotionally the same way that others do. We tend to be less afraid than others. When other kids, and often even adults, become afraid of something, we become intrigued, fascinated. We very quickly realize that remaining calm when others are afraid is an advantage.

We also very soon realize that all the feelings, such as love and empathy, and guilt or remorse, seem to be mere constructs that the adults try to force us to feel, but which really don't exist. We see adults and kids display these emotions on a daily basis, and we're expected to display them also, and we find that it's easy to pretend, everybody believe us even as we're merely faking it. Nobody seems to acknowledge that empathy isn't real, so we assume everybody are doing what we are doing, everybody are faking emotions.

We've always been told that adults know everything, but we find that they don't know the difference between faking and actually feeling something, so we grow suspicious. Maybe the adults don't know everything after all?

The world reveals itself as an arena where the strong, those who have control over their emotions and who don't feel the emotions that seems to only weaken others, are kings and queens. Psychopaths become adept at reading others at an early age - if we have the opportunity to observe others, that is. Not all have the same opportunities in life, and for some psychopathic individuals there's only the small time criminal's way out of crushing boredom.

Whether or not a psychopath realize that s/he is a psychopath depends a lot upon social and cultural background. Where I come from I may have heard the word psychopath before I turned 18, but after I received my diagnosis the first time I only checked up on what it meant twice. I did so by reading two books on clinical psychiatry. One was written by the principal of the most notorious prison in the state, where all the criminally insane, and therefore also the diagnosed psychopaths, were send. The other was a scholarly book about psychiatric diagnoses in general. - But both books were outdated and described psychopathy as according to the older freudian terminology, and I didn't recognize myself in any of it.

It wasn't until about a year ago that I took up the research again, this time with a more serious intention of finding out what it really means to be a psychopath. And luckily there have been written more realistic - if still somewhat dark - descriptions of psychopathy within the last two or so decades.

So to the question: Do psychopaths know they're psychopaths?, I guess the answer is yes, and no.

We certainly know we're different, and we have a good idea about how we're different. But if we haven't read or been told about the real meaning of the term psychopathy, we don't know this is what we are.

Other than that it is safe to say that over the last decade or so there has been a growing attention on psychopathy. Where psychopaths used to be mentioned by using words that mainly describe our behavior, the word psychopath has now become more commonly used in connections with behaviors and traits that we easily recognize as descriptive characteristics in our personality.

And that is why psychopaths are more commonly aware that they are psychopaths in recent years, just as normal people are beginning to become more aware of us. It happens via the media, we overhear it being talked about from friends or family, or we find out about it via a variety of other sources such as f.ex. books or movies.

We are at present becoming much more aware of ourselves than ever before, and we're aware about the fact that 'what we are' has a special position in the public mind, in modern society... A position that may have changed with the changes through time in the history and modern culture. This is something I will research and find out more about.

As for now...

I know there is a name for what I am: Psychopath.

I see a tendency towards more psychopaths also beginning to come forward and being open about what they are... mainly via ways of the Internet, which is understandable.
And I'll will be following the progress in the coming years with great interest.

*

127 comments:

Haven said...

I think people often have an incredibly difficult time understanding that lack of empathy. Somewhere inside people think it’s a choice, or that psycho/socios do not want to change. If they wanted to feel empathy they could and therefore would no longer be ‘bad’. It is an utterly foreign concept that someone lacks something that they take for granted and are conditioned to believe is ‘normal’. Except what is normal for one person is not normal for another. It’s just different. Media popularizes the ‘evil’ actions of psycho/socios because they can point at one thing, lack of empathy, and it gives a solid reason that people can understand. This makes them feel better about themselves because, if that thing is bad, and they are not like that, then by extension they can consider themselves good. They can point to a condition and say that’s why someone can do horrible things, while forgetting that even more ‘normal/empathic’ people are capable of and have doing harm. Except just because something is different doesn’t make it good/bad, just different. People are afraid of things they do not understand, can’t understand… because they feel and can’t know what it’s like to not feel. They’ve popularized something so that a cultural stigma has been ingrained in the thought process of everyone, making it very difficult and confusing to understand just what something is.

ResCogitans said...

if i wince when i see someone kicked in the nuts, does that mean i feel empathy? :p

Anonymous said...

No, psychopaths have cold empathy, they know other people are hurt but they do not care, they lack the emotional slap.

TheNotablePath said...

I knew I was different from other people, but I thought I was different in a good way, and in my heart I still think so.

This. SO much this. Now people call that Narcissism, as if knowing I'm a better person somehow needs a pathology connected to it. If I am superior with using logic and knowing how people tick, and have an objective view on most things, does that make me mental?

NO!

That makes me clear headed. That makes me superior. That makes the best person at what I do.

I'm not mentally challenged, I was born with a superior genetic predisposition, and any naysayer's opinion otherwise means fuck all to me.

Nyx said...

I think people think that we're making a choice to be "selfish" or "cruel" because we are self-aware, even though this isn't true. We know what we are, but we think it's a good thing because it benefits us. I don't think they understand our perspective, or at least they can't open their minds to imagine what a perspective like ours would be.

Zhawq said...

ResCogitans:

"if i wince when i see someone kicked in the nuts, does that mean i feel empathy? :p"

It's a form of empathy, yes.

I myself have never reacted like that. But I can easily see how the other person feels. I just don't feel it myself (after all, I was not kicked in the nuts).

It's as if there's some mystical invisible connection between people. One get's kicked in the nuts and goes 'OUCH!, and then the next goes 'Ugh!', wincing, and so does the next, and so on.

Further down the line someone may react to the same input even though they didn't see or hear the guy who actually DID get kicked in the nuts.

Where does it stop, this connection?

Maybe it's just that it stops earlier in people like myself?

Anonymous said...

Has anyone ever played the game with themself where you stub your toe and you know exactly how it will feel in approx 2 seconds after you make contact with the end table? And then you wish he pain away before the onset of it?

ResCogitans said...

if i wince when i see someone kicked in the nuts, does that mean i feel empathy? :p

Bella said...

Res, you watch a lot of "Jackass" ?

Bella said...

Res, you watch a lot of "Jackass" ?

Lisa said...

Hey; get a grip; even so called "normal people" those that do feel remorse, also have other demons to deal with; you are like you are; the center of your own universe, and thus the center of your own demise.

There is no way that any kind of good person would want to hurt another person with there actions such as P's do. So what is opposit in black and white; good? = Evil. And that is what people like you do to unsuspecting kind and giving people; and you are so full of yourselves to brag about it like your are some sort of superior being? If this is the way that we are going genetically, that I do wish that all you nut cases are friggen sterilized so you can not make more of yourselfs. You are confused, misguided and harmful people.

Everyone is mentally challenged, that is what learning is.. I cannot believe what I am reading here, so caught up on yourselves you don't give a damn about anyone else; rue the day that you need a kind gesture from a complete stranger and that stranger turns out to be one of you.

Anonymous said...

All you mental society freaks should take what Lisa says and try to turn that in your own behalf; good luck.

Anonymous said...

I find this site fascinating, I would probably be labled an émpath by your kind. Don't worry I will spare you from any writings of self pity. I don't consider myself they way your commenters have portrayed me..there are alot of misunderstandings I think. Just as you have to learn emotions which are foreign to you, we have to learn the emotions that you experience that are foreign to us.

My last brush with a psychopath was a couple of weeks ago, fortunately for me his "Mask" was quite poorly constructed and his true self was leaking out all over the place....I was quite amused actually and kept up the phone conversations for a few more days just to learn a bit more about his 'pathology'. It wasn't until I cut him off that I realised just how dangerous and explosive his rage was, if I had been standing in front of him I know he would have had difficulty controlling his urge to break my neck (no exaggeration). He was by far the most dangerous one I have met in terms of rage. During our conversations he was 'projecting' so I quite quickly figured out he was trying to scam me out of money under the guise of a romantic relationship.

I think his rage mainly came from that he lost control of the situation and his prey escaped. However as you say I know that he will apply his own perspective to the situation and in his mind and in his potrayal of the situation to his next prey he will be the victor through him being so terribly 'wronged' by me.

The most intersting thing I have found is that I seem to be a magnet for psychopaths - this is my fourth encounter with one during a relationship. I have now learn't how to identify you very quickly. But I continue to attract psychopaths into my life...

I learn't as much as I could about you, read every book available. I guess I have come to the conclusion that we have a lot to learn from each other.

I have learn't my lesson and I will never get personally involved with a psychopath again, unfortunatley your goal in a relationship is different to mine so it can never work.

Why is it that you are attracted to women with an abundance of empathy? I find it curious.

Zhawq said...

Lisa:

you are like you are; the center of your own universe, and thus the center of your own demise.

I'm sure this is how it is for everybody, not only psychopaths.

There is no way that any kind of good person would want to hurt another person with there actions such as P's do.

In my experience this is completely true. There's a big difference between the way psychopaths hurt and the way that normal people do the same. It's one of the central points in the diagnosis.

So what is opposit in black and white; good? = Evil. And that is what people like you do to unsuspecting kind and giving people;

I'm not sure what you mean by "good? = evil." But psychopaths do have a way of 'turning tables' so to speak, which is part of our technique to hurt others when they least expect it, and even make them hurt themselves.

and you are so full of yourselves to brag about it like your are some sort of superior being?

You got me, it's completely true.
However, I do think I also try to see things from other perspectives, and I dare say that when I sometimes give in to bragging it is often because of some frustration in my private life. It isn't a permanent viewpoint, nor a viewpoint I'm trying to put forth on this website per se.

Rather I am actually trying to see things from the normal individuals perspective, I'm trying to learn! And if I sometimes find it hard to see anything new, or especially 'good' in the ways of how normal people live and function, I can't see that as being only due to a fault of my own.
Both sides have flaws, normal people aren't saints!

If this is the way that we are going genetically, that I do wish that all you nut cases are friggen sterilized so you can not make more of yourselfs.

You're not alone with this, Lisa. In fact, it is the common view of normative society. But I could argue that you're in the grip of your emotions, that you aren't using logic, and that every species - when facing a stronger version of themselves - must naturally react with fear at the perspective of their possible loss of power and monopoly on 'Truth'.

You are confused, misguided and harmful people.

I am not people, I am one individual. I am also not confused, though I do not claim to know it all. I was misguided, once, when I was in the power of neurotypical people, yes. But not anymore. I'm guiding myself to a degree most normal people can't comprehend.

Am I harmful? In little ways, perhaps. But in the larger scheme of things I believe I'm one of the good guys, absolutely!

Zhawq said...

Anon 6:39:

I find this site fascinating

Thank you.

I would reply to you right here, but your comment has inspired me to do a little more than that. So I'm going to write an article, and thus make an attempt at giving a more thorough description about how I see and understand these things.

Thanks again!... '^L^,

Anonymous said...

Hey Zhawg,
Congrats on your site. Great Job! You MrB? Hope so.
Want to delve into teaching/learning the differences between you and "us" with one who likely can keep up intellectually?

We all have much to learn.
Say around 9pm EST?

Anonymous said...

Interesting stuff.

I'm not a psychopath, rather I tend to suffer from the opposite. I seem to have this heightened empathy. Really irritating trait to have to be honest with you.

It can cloud your judgement and makes you vulenerable.

I come from a family where dysfunction rules. My mother could be described as a sociopath and my father had similar traits. They saw their kids as objects to controlled and disposed of at will.

Both my parents, especially my mother, worked on fear, control and total dominance. Impulse problems plagued my mother. Ruthless tyranny and even as children, she would fault us for the wrongs in her life.

Not surprisingly, my brother from a early age also exhibited traits where he would manipulate others and get them to take the fall, he was selfish, controlling, violent and always blamed everyone for his problems. Played the victim card all the time.

I had to cut these people out of my life because it was too toxic and life is too short to deal with this nonsense. I felt some saddnes to move on, they just shrugged.

I remember as a child though, feeling nothing when seeing people hurt and in pain in the streets or at school. I felt disconnected. This changed as I got older. Very weird.

I have a co-worker who is absolutely a certified sociopath though. Her attempts to destablize the environment and cause mayhem with random, unprovoked attacks while blaming everyone while proclaiming her brillance and superiority is something to behold.

Anonymous said...

I recently discovered & diagnosed my husband of 24 years.. Time, tolerance & respect for all.. This was the most informative information to date.I now can put the last piece of the puzzle together.. Bless you.. Finally, i can justify why I forgive him for his verbal, physical & emotional abuse to our family.. Eve been to hell.. I knew he was too.. Now we are back & education is a wonderful thing.. I love him & He loves me.. I promised him I would make him happy for better or worse.. Forgive him for he knows not what hes done.

Anonymous said...

hmm, this is very interesting. that person above me sounds a bit in denial or dissociated. justifying abuse? idk if i could do that. i would think a psychopath could control themselves if they wanted to, right? if they want a particular outcome. i think haven's comment is very good, that it's a difference. it's biological. they can't help the way they are, but that doesn't mean what they do is ok or there aren't consequences. if they don't have empathy, they can still operate logically. they don't want to be in prison, right? yiek. you don't want negative consequences right? i wonder if i am psychopath/sociopath, bc i do want what i want, act like i care about people but kind of don't, sometimes think listening is a waste of time unless it benefits me somehow or i am learning something. yet at other times i do feel empathy, and do care about particular people, the world, humanity, etc. i don't try to hurt others but i think i do and don't want to, unless they hurt me. do psychopaths not want revenge? or maybe that's narcissist/borderline. the labels, have to get past the labels. people are people, we have to coexist somehow. if you think only of yourself, i would think that makes psychopaths unintelligent and short-sighted, it's helpful to have others to survive. all depends on what kind of life you want. i think there still has to be a base foundation commonality of human, understanding. you still have basic needs. do you care if your wife, partner or children are killed? do you not care about yourself? maybe not. i think it's a spectrum, some worse than others.

Nikita said...

I love him & He loves me.. I promised him I would make him happy for better or worse.. Forgive him for he knows not what hes done.



lol....A willing victim.
I hope you don't have children.

Kenmeer livermaile said...

To anonymous said of the post beginning "Interesting stuff":

I am very curious about this statement:

"I remember as a child though, feeling nothing when seeing people hurt and in pain in the streets or at school. I felt disconnected. This changed as I got older. Very weird."

Like many, I have often thought of myself as an 'empath'. Our culture superficially lauds this quality (even if it often behaves otherwise), and this makes me suspicious of my self-assessment. However, it's probably more true than not. As a child, when fights were forced on me in the schoolyard, I'd cry after hitting the other person. Inflicting harm was painful to me. So it seems likely I have strong inherent empathetic tendencies.

But, as an older adult, while I still have powerful, even overwhelming episodes of compassion, I also increasingly have powerful internal rages, and have frequent fantasy flashes of pounding someone's face into the pavement until I'm... satisfied.

This emotion usually derives from things that offend my sense of justice, which feeling merges with a sense of vulnerability. The idea of a cop abusing his sworn charge to Serve and Protect, who uses his gun and badge and legal protection to harm those he is sworn to protect... murderous rage.

This in turn comes from a sense of superior understanding of 'How Things Really Work', which derives in part from being uncommonly bright all my life, seeking out unorthodox perspectives, emphasizing as I grew older my capacity for rational logic, and (crucial point here) the alienation that comes from this.

In short: arrogance. For me, arrogance is 'false pride' covering a sense of inferiority or vulnerability. It's like how animals (including homo saps) puff themselves up to appear bigger than they really are.

Anyway, now that I've rambled as I think aloud, I repeat that I'm very curious about how an apparent lack of empathy changed and, in your opinion swung to a somewhat extreme position on the other, compassionate side.

I'm also intrigued how so much evil can be done in the cause of justice (and I don't mean crooked cops; they do harm under the protecting disguise of the name of justice; I mean how I can eagerly engage in very intensely violent fantasies/desires because I feel someone has abused justice, the Golden Rule, et cetera.

Anonymous said...

so what does bad mean to a psychopath? what causes you pain?

i just rather intensely fell in love with a - i think - borderline psychopath, while realising that pathology in her from the start. it's actually what fascinated me so much, as i'd never met a female pyschopath before. it's been a ride.

Kenmeer livermaile said...

Please tell us about your wild ride, anonymous? I'm genuinely fascinated.

Anonymous said...

ok, kenmeer. i've fallen in love twice in my life, and i will honestly say that i fell in love with this particular female of the species, and she told me the same. she warned me about herself, too, lol. and i think her particular uniqueness is what fascinated me so. i too would tend towards being an empath (funny, i read in other comments that another person that described themself as an empath said she'd fallen in love with psychopaths 4 times...i think that the empaths can feel the normalcy that is in a psychopath and try to honour that, so you'll also see that i do see psychopathy as a form of damage, and i mean no offense to any psychopath, indeed i find this site fascinating as i've never seen psychopaths discussing honestly among themselves what makes them tick), and i happen to be apparently insanely old fashioned about the link between love and sex. i'm a 30something who has had sex with 2 women in my life (i have a child with one of them) and wondered quite seriously about becoming a monk when i was younger, she is the same age and i would guess the figure is in the 100s. she's a string of broken husbands behind her, too. she happens to be rich, too, so the potential relationship was always going to be unlikely in the extreme, but i can't deny i found her magnetically attractive, and the past couple of weeks have contained some of the most intense emotions i've ever experienced. i actually felt the need to fast for a couple of days to cope with this shit, hahaha.

Kenmeer livermaile said...

Thanx for sharing (sounds corny; I mean it). I have selfish reasons along with my genuine interest in the subject and my personal compassion overall. (Call me an empath and it please us, although tender heart will do.)

If you trust me, let's chat further via email? (This is a socio site, after all, and we have no facial/body language by which ti judge each other, only these abstract words, and words, language, are practically synonymous with 'lies' and, I suspect, words created, aeons ago, the lie per se. Before words and their ability to objectify 'what ifs', communication must've been mostly congruent. I've never seen a dog lie in the proactive sense. The most I've seen is a passive lie: the junkyard dog that lies still, seemingly harmless, until you cross a certain line and the goes to murder you.)... anyway, I'd like to continue this via email. I am at pastmastergeneral@gmail.com

I promise to be both a good listener and fairly entertaining. People tell me I'm an interesting correspondent and a nice man.

And any socios who want to fuck with my head at that eddress, go for it. I like to think I'm a pretty good skull fuck, y'know?

Anonymous said...

it's an unusual story, so here's the rest; we'll call her h. a good friend that i've caught up with again over the past year told me a few months ago about a woman he knew. the description included the line "very difficult woman", which intrigued me, because i guess i see myself as quite a difficult guy. different, would be my honest choice of word. getting divorced and rich were 2 of his other descriptors. how i see myself is quite important to the story, i think, so here we go at that; reincarnation is a reality, we come here (earth) in a state of amnesia but there is access to a larger side of your quote self unquote (fractal consciousness is a good description) through meditation/drugs/hypnosis, and that larger self is the conscious being that incarnates many times, in many places, forgetting each time, learning each time. i'm no buddhist, but the concept of maya is familiar to me, the endlessly spinning wheel of the world, all of it an emanation of something more fundamental, more profound. i've experienced once, for a half moment, in meditation, an infinite, silent consciousness that is the ground of this world. i suspect there's a lot more beyond that, but it is beyond my ability to comprehend, because i'm a subset of it. a fractal shard of that. i'm currently lightly toasted and enjoy words, too. and anyway we come here for various reasons, to serve various viewpoints, and i perceive myself as being in service to what i can perhaps term the source of creation. and i tend to live that, and love is incarnate expression of that source. that's why i've had sex with 2 women, the bond between the simple physical act of fucking and the consciousness of the people can be relatively broken, i agree (though if taken to extremes, it tends often to lead to suicide, if you look at porn actors for example), and there's a sanctity in the conscious choice to honour that link between the fucking and the loving that i choose not to break. insanely old fashioned, i get generally perceived as.

after i'd heard about h, the same friend invited me to a party, turns out (i discovered this midparty, before she'd kissed me, i think) that it was h's party. i still think i reacted with a familiarity to her upon first meeting, and she certainly stumbled over her well-practised social niceties. i found her magnetic, overtly sexual. she fed me a lime from her hand, gave me a blowback and topped it off with a momentary kiss, completely unexpected to me, completely welcome to me. i don't think i've ever been so instantly turned on, as i was by h's kiss.

i discovered the next day that i'd lost some paraphernalia, so sent her a text asking if i'd left my tobacco at her house. apparently so, so i went by with my daughter to collect it, stayed for a beer, chatted a bit with her husband, wandered off again. still finding her pretty damn sexy. she's since told me that she goes to bars to pick up men, randomly fucks men while being in this divorce process for years, and doesn't recall the kiss that had such impact upon me. i think that i recognised this woman somehow from the moment i met her, and understood how she could be, and allowed myself to be seduced by her. anyway, mutual friend's wife mentions to h some time later that i'd mentioned to her that i liked h, cue a text some time later from h about a long and exciting dream she'd had about me. we exchanged i'd guess 50 texts over the next 3 days, and i got one from her that said, i'm absolutely in love with you. i could honestly only answer her the same, even knowing that she'd even warned me about herself via an email, describing herself as feeding on love.

Anonymous said...

we met a few days ago at her father's grave and had a couple of beers in a bar. we could have ended up having sex somewhere easily, she told me. she told me about one of the bars she goes to to pick up men while we were having a beer, and was clearly a little disgusted as she described the place...one of those funny little co-incidences happened as she was describing, she spotted a rat a few feet away and changed the subject to "ugh look at that dirty rat", and on went the discussion. this woman is a mother of 2 kids who seemed genuinely nice kids (i get comments from people about how happy my young daughter seems to be, and her kids reminded me of the qualities in my daughter that i think generate these comments, a simple confidence in themselves). so i tend to see her as being aware of positive love, and of delving into some of purely physical aspects of sex that are best not detached from love, because they cause varying degrees of pain (to most) if detached. i am genuinely attracted to this woman, and would be happy to be in a relationship with her, but i would choose to start that in her bed, with her husband gone. second date was today, it was last night i started to consciously put the pieces together i knew of her into the word "sociopath" (what is the difference between socio- and psycho-, anyway?), and rather had my doubts about today's meeting. turns out she stood me up; i think she gave me just long enough to fuck her, not any more.

so, been a ride. i went into it open eyed and knew it would probably end like this, but still dreamt the dream of love for her for those few days. and i'd probably do it again!

Kenmeer livermaile said...

anonymous: ooh! And you're highly intelligent along with being highly compassionate! Score!

fascinating stuff. I will comment later. Work at hand.

Kenmeer livermaile said...

BTW, anonymous, you've created an interesting ambiguity: are you a socio enjoying playing the compassionate quasi-Buddhist or are you what you say?

You verbiage feels congruent, on first quick read, with the latter, but mimicry by a brilliant socio 'artist' can be quite convincing.

What prompts this remark is not the general ambiguity of remote words-only posting on such a forum, but that you did not acknowledge my question about email, not even so much as a 'Nah, I'll pass.'

So here I am with my private email hanging in the wind on a socio site where any sadistic type might try and mess with me in a # of ways, and you haven't even answered my question.

That said, I find people, empathetic or cold fish, are remarkably good at ignoring the most elemental courtesies even (or especially) as they wish me a "*WONDERFUL day!* or, as we have here, pour their apparent heart out regarding the woman they fell in love with, the meaning of life, and fractal perceptions of the great and powerful Atman of Oz.

Which is, ironically, the kind of mistake I suspect any decently proficient sociopath rarely makes, the mask of sanity being as crucial to their well-being as remembering to use our turn-blinkers are to a driver, and that chalks a mark in favor of your being sincere.

On begins to see what a fun playground normal human relations can be for a chronically bored sociopath. We are often like a pair of shoes tied together, we neuro-t's(normals).

Anonymous said...

i did take a test a few days ago, and scored pretty normal. for psycopathy, anyway!

Kenmeer livermaile said...

v

Kenmeer livermaile said...

Oops. Try again. We might as well learn to pass them now before they become mandatory screens.

Anonymous said...

I have started group therapy for alcohol and they request emotion exploration and I find myself making stories up and crying about them to mask what the counselors want to see and I completely realate to the charm,manipulation,pathological lies,and total narcissism but on the same note I love my mom so does this dissqualify my self diagnosed psychopathy

Anonymous said...

Thank you for this post. the self-discovery of being "different" is exactly like my childhood. Recently I've been researching into psychopathy, but I wasn't convinced since I'm not some sinister figure rubbing his hands with evil glee and cackling madly at the thought of his next maniacal scheme.... Keep up the good work here. It's facinating.

Anonymous said...

It is eerie how well I relate to this post.

I've been doing research for a character I've been writing as (a psychopathic woman in Victorian England) in an online Role Play forum.

The human mind, body, and emotions have always fascinated me even as a child.

I was the fearless kid. In the worst situations I learned that it was advantageous to remain calm in the face of danger. It saved me with a run in with a pack of cyotes, and again when I had a gun pointed at me (The man was bluffing). I was skeptical of everything, and had logical, although somewhat inhumane, thoughts and ideas.

There were times in my youth where I questioned whether the psychopathic label (Or possibly BPD) fit. Am I fooling myself into believing I care for this person? I think I love them, but I don't feel I love them. I don't feel anything. Tomorrow I could move on as if they didn't exist but I was always taught that if I loved them this isn't how I should be. A breakup, however, would upset me because it feels like a loss on my end.

I manipulate, without realizing I manipulate, and when I confess that I may be manipulating the person, they become even more vulnerable and trusting.

But then I reassured myself that I am not a psychopath or sociopath by thinking no, I am not dangerous or criminally insane. I would not kill or bring unnecessary physical harm to another human being.

But even now, at the back of my mind I wonder is it because I cannot bring myself to harm someone, or is it because I'm avoiding the punishment it brings.

There were those childhood memories where I, out of curiousity, may have tortured and killed animals, but then even the more empathetic of my friends have had those experiences.

Kenmeer livermaile said...

There is nothing inherently wrong with being an s/p. A poverty of emotional empathy does not equal an abundance of intentional cruelty or any intentional cruelty at all. Intentional cruelty, sadism, seems to me more likely committed by persons with emotional empathy. Compassion can be painful. Very painful. In a complex number of ways.

Directly, it hurts because one emotionally represents in another's pain within one's neurology in a way that involves the limbic system, releasing many stress-inducing neurochemicals that induce stress (neuropsychology indulges tautologies). This stress can hurt more than the sheer pshysiological sensations the body feels because the mind enfolds them with conscious models that the psyche labels as 'bad', thereby triggering other unpleasant neurochems. The mind also enfolds them with memories of physical pain.

All these are triggered when, for example, my daughter's chronically painful disease/condition flares up and she curls up fetal and whimpers. It hurts me too.

This compassion, 'hurting with', can serve the cause of mutual aid well, since it compels me to aid her in seeking relief. But it can serve us poorly, since my primary impulse is to stop MY suffering via compassion for her, and compel me to selfish behavior that detracts me from the best and wisest response to the torture her body sometimes puts her through.

The broad label of sociopaths as seekers of cruel thrills disserves s/ps and normals; the broad label of normals as somehow morally superior to s/ps also disserves both. Normals are pros at wrapping themselves in righteous labels and then creating enormous suffering thereby. The 'religulous' right is a prominent example of this, with their brand label moral cause, stopping abortion. They feel compassion for innocent fetuses both because it's so easy to feel compassion for infants and modern science shows us images in the womb of fetuses looking like itsy bitsy babies.

But feeling compassion for skag ho heroin prostitutes is hard for them, and their actions overall show little compassion for them -- or for the babies that the religulous insist these women bring into the world. (cpntinued)

Kenmeer livermaile said...

Compassion is a very broad emotional tool that helps bond humans together in loving ways, rewarding us for promoting group survival as well as individual survival, but it easily overwhelms us with its powerful emotional flows of good and bad feelings.

But that very broadness of emotional empathy also makes it perhaps the most central and important component of the human psyche.S/p's struggle with boredom that some descriotins paint as soul-crushing. There is this emptiness in their lives that has nothing to do with their personal decisions of beliefs but their inability to feel in kind with what 75-to-99% o the populace feels, and worse, to relate to the bulk of their genetically derived constitution: are neurologies are evolved to center around love and empathy. Not solely -- we have other centers -- but a loving heart is pretty much the most cherished human attribute. Not having one seems to create great problems for s/ps, and they suffer in their attempts to fill this void, especially since their attempts often cause others to suffer, and that messes things up and makes an s/p's life precarious in many ways.

Like so many moral issues, the divide between norms and s/ps will probably be superseded by our rising ability to hack human neurophysiology.

Drugs and microsurgery will allow s/ps to feel emotional empathy; and drugs will grant the more compassionate among us relief from the more severe punishments of compassion. The use of neutral, objective artifacts like artificial neural circuits and tiny little pills will also tend to demystify and unsanctify our more sanctimonious tendencies. Self-righteousness will be identified to some extent as just another neuroses, something a person may enjoy feeling (or not) but not a sign of 'superior moral character'. The concept of moral character is nauseatingly rife with contradictory bunk, something I would think s/ps are more aware of than normals.

But s/ps also romanticize and distort their view of themsleves and others. One needn't be emotionally empathic to be hypcoritically full of shit, and I see much of this in the expressions of s/ps. They are human beings, after all, and one of the defining attributes of homo sapiens is our capacity for self-delusion.

Anonymous said...

Kenmeer Livermaile

Your post is very well said.
I don't feel love, but I would like to know, out of curiosity, what it is to be authentically in love with another. I go through the motions but there is an emptiness to it all that once left me leaping from partner to partner, out of belief that it was their fault, not mine.

Even when I get in arguments with people, I know at the back of my head that I am apathetically arguing but I still go through the motions of it as it is habitual.

Kenmeer livermaile said...

Love? Logically, you probably have a pretty good idea. emotionally? Many emotional varieties but they all center on a pressure in the center of the ribcage above the solar plexus, a sense of expanding space in the stomach,and ofttimes a mild contriction in the throat and tearful pressure in the eyes.

But the key part is, I think, the nexus of love and other emotions and accompanying thoughts. I'll describe it with an extreme example I read in a book called Encyclopedia of the Jews or something like that.

During the early days of the Holocaust before Zyklon-B gas and the ovens, the Final Solution was applied by hand, usually with bullets.

I read of Jews, typically who families and neighborhoods, being led into giant pits to be shot and buried. grandparents, parents, children.

Grandparents worked with parents to comfort the children. They held themselves in a form of grace, singing soft songs to the children, thinking their brightest thoughts (religion, with its emphasis on afterlife, probably helped).

They were able to give themselves comfort by comforting those that they could.

That is what foundational love feels like, I think: a warm comforting magnet into which one pours one's worries and feels comforted thereby. That's the main vein good stuff. other kinds are more like romantic obsession. They still involve the emotions I describe,m but in an exaggeratedly ecstatic way prone to obsession and unhappy endings. It shares aspects with sociopathic obs ession with someone, being less nurturing and more destructive, although between norms it damages both. However, in such romance, there is usually, as Adlous Huxley said, "THe lover and the loved."

The loved usually gets hurt much less, and is a figure a classic s/P might relate to.

But love-love: mama-child, husband-wife, any love that endures beyond temporary infatuation or expediency, resembles what I first described.

Kenmeer livermaile said...

Love? Logically, you probably have a pretty good idea. emotionally? Many emotional varieties but they all center on a pressure in the center of the ribcage above the solar plexus, a sense of expanding space in the stomach,and ofttimes a mild contriction in the throat and tearful pressure in the eyes.

But the key part is, I think, the nexus of love and other emotions and accompanying thoughts. I'll describe it with an extreme example I read in a book called Encyclopedia of the Jews or something like that.

During the early days of the Holocaust before Zyklon-B gas and the ovens, the Final Solution was applied by hand, usually with bullets.

I read of Jews, typically who families and neighborhoods, being led into giant pits to be shot and buried. grandparents, parents, children.

Grandparents worked with parents to comfort the children. They held themselves in a form of grace, singing soft songs to the children, thinking their brightest thoughts (religion, with its emphasis on afterlife, probably helped).

They were able to give themselves comfort by comforting those that they could.

That is what foundational love feels like, I think: a warm comforting magnet into which one pours one's worries and feels comforted thereby. That's the main vein good stuff. other kinds are more like romantic obsession. They still involve the emotions I describe,m but in an exaggeratedly ecstatic way prone to obsession and unhappy endings. It shares aspects with sociopathic obs ession with someone, being less nurturing and more destructive, although between norms it damages both. However, in such romance, there is usually, as Adlous Huxley said, "THe lover and the loved."

The loved usually gets hurt much less, and is a figure a classic s/P might relate to.

But love-love: mama-child, husband-wife, any love that endures beyond temporary infatuation or expediency, resembles what I first described.

Kenmeer livermaile said...

Her's a song by a band known for sappy sentimental love songs that nonetheless hits me hard and sweet (and I'm a classical/jazz snob):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D9gxVmsni4s

Lyrics follow

Kenmeer livermaile said...

I feel my heartbeat,
when you run your fingers through my hair, oh yeah
I can tell you,
I can feel you by my side when you're not there, oh yeah
Just as my life fades to darkness
you you make me see the light.
Show me that my search is over
I pay the price, I pay the price.

Tell you someday, baby you and I should be one, one.
Do it always, brighter than the eye can see, we hide the sun.

The taste of love is sweet, like honey on the vine,
like the wind that feeds the fire, two souls become entwined.
Someday baby you and I should be one, one.

VERSE 2:
So I'm standing on this corner
Tall enough to touch the New York sky, oh yeah
Love is so blind
I just cannot hear or see the world go by, oh yeah
Someone can love so completely
One kiss should break the seal.
Truth can be stranger than fiction
This love is real
This love is real.

Tell you someday Baby, you and I should be one, one.
Do it always, brighter than the eye can see, we hide the sun.

BRIDGE:
Ah we are one, we are one.

VERSE 3:
I will follow
Count on me, I'll never let you down, oh yeah
My devotion
Loving like an ocean I would surely drown, oh yeah
You'll be my only possession
I'll be a slave to you
We hold the power together
Just me and you
Just me and you.

Tell you someday Baby, you and I should be one, one.
Do it always, brighter than the eye can see, we hide the sun.
Tell you someday Baby, you and I should be one, one.

I think somebody might
I go down on my knees
You see love can be blind
It's there under your fear
I know I must be strong
And go into the night
And see all that I want

[You know my life is in your hands,
and every breath you take is planned
and all this love goes on forever.]

Tell you someday Baby, you and I should be one, one.
Do it someday Baby, you and I should be one, one.
Do it someday Baby, you and I should be one, one.... (Repeat to Fade)

Kenmeer livermaile said...

it's an apotheostic ideal of emotionally purposeful relations, and possibly only a minority experience it, but after 24 years of marriage, she and I got at least to the door and are very much enjoying the warmth and glow from that doorway.

The cobination of pleasant neurochems and accomplishment is a poweful drug.

Kenmeer livermaile said...

'and every breath you take is planned "

Amazing thing about this song's lyrics is they evoke such supernal and universal themes with only once even hinting at something like God or divine teleology (the verse above).

s said...

this song for me is a great example of what love feels like:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JTx4dp5ROlk

You are my everything,
My head and my heart my mind my wing,
The past the present tomorrow too,
I'll spend my final day
with you.

I hope you feel the way I do,
I hope you give yourself up too,
I'm damned to feel the way I do,
What have I done
to fall so hard
for you.

i disagree with her damned line, but the naked honesty of this song touches me...i hope you give yourself up too, that line caused me pause.

and the h situation ended as expected, lol. so now i'm going to share with her what i think, because as kenmeer pointed out to me via an email, i do tend towards the magical thinker, and i do believe that we meet each other with reason, that the universe is a basically sensible place, despite appearances, haha. so if you see another anonymous poster sharing her thoughts here (as i'll direct her here if she doesn't murder me first!), could end up being an even more interesting discussion!

Anonymous said...

You say you are GOOD people?! A Psychopath is essentially a thief, a lier and a manipulator eh eh... So basically all you will say afterwards will be a LIE, especially anything to do with money in particular... They will rob their own blood, like cowards, they will exploit their own children, who cannot defend themselves, and wouldnt defend themselves against their own father anyways, even if the son weighed 400 pounds and the father 100... The children cannot imagine beeing robbed by their own parents, because they are normal... They cannot imagine someone robbing their own blood, as it is fondamentaly illogical and cowardly... This is how the psychopatrh fools his family, so easily, yet he is the worst coward in the world... I have experience, I have had the very bad luck of beeing born with a psychopatic father... Much much better to NOT have a Father, much much better, you are luckier... Thanks

Anonymous said...

I was involved with a Psychopath when I was 16.(I am now 56).It's only in recent years that I have worked out he was a psychopath, and for some reason, lately I have been thinking almost constantly about those times.

He was a priest of all things, a jesuit and our formaster at my jesuit school.

He took me under his wing and made me his "right hand man", to use his terminology. At the time, I was somewhat of a troubled soul, my dad didn't take any notice of me and I was desperate for some sort of role model.

He soon became my hero, I thought the sun shone right out of his backside and so did a lot of other people. He could be impossibly charming. He took me out drinking, to see grown up films(not porn, by the way) and talked to me as if I was an adult.

For a priest he was not the least bit religous, by the way.He also made me secretary of the basketball team to which he was coach and we used to take the younger kids on camping trips.

This went on for about a year. There were times like I described above, and then there were other times, where he used to taunt me, I had a bit of a temper you see, and when he'd manage to make me angry he would pick a mock fight.

One time he dragged me across the hot sand on the beach, the next day, my back was one open sore. He was then over me in a pretend fight, but what the other kids couldn't see was that he was digging his knee as hard as he could into my balls. It hurt like hell.

He had a knack of looking inside people as I have never seen in anyone before.

Very often we would be sitting at a table having a drink and his attention would be taken up by watching people on the other side of the room, and he would tell me what they were like, and how they were reacting to one another and why even though he never met them.

I am now 56 and I have never to this day seen anyone with anything approaching his talent for looking through people. I would say he was the most intelligent man I have met to this day. Raw intelligence that is.

He would also 'adopt' and charm families, and they would invite him to their house, take him out for dinner several times a week. Eventually, he would always drop them unceremoniously and move on to a new family.

Naturally my time to be dropped came too and he did it spectacularly.

He waited till after a basketball match, when everyone was gathered together in the changing room and then really got stuck into me verbally, it came out of nowhere. He told me to go away and never come back, that he wanted nothing to do with me, that I was boring, no good, I don't really remember any of it except that it seemed to go on for ever, his shouting at me in front of everyone.
When it was over, i remember going home and staring into space for hours.

He was as good as his word, after that he looked at me as though he was looking through thin air. I fell into deep depression for a long time, and also at this time developed very severe asthma which may or may not have anything to do with this experience.

I couldn't talk about this to anyone, indeed I wouldn't have known what to say I was that disorientated. All the other boys who were present in the changing room never spoke about what happened, but knowing him, he would have given them a debriefing after I was told to go away.

All I can remember is that I disliked myself intensley and in some way blamed myself for the whole thing.

I suppose to an extent, I would have been a nuisance in the end always being around. But I couldn't understand how someone was always asking you over to everything one minute and be chasing you away in the next, I was only 16 after all.

He was also a pathological liar. He would say things like "are you calling me a liar" in situations that I and himself would have known it was a lie because we were both there.

Sorry for this long post, I have never talked about this to anyone,ironically a psychopath's blog seemed to be the perfect place

Anonymous said...

From what I can tell, empathy is a spectrum trait. We can exist anywhere on a spectrum, from 0 empathy at the lowest to 100 at the highest end, let's say.

I don't really feel the need to label myself. But I would estimate that I'm lower than average- I hover around a 40 on a scale of 1-100. I used to get bored a lot when I was young, but I guess I've found ways to entertain myself. Keeping busy and having concrete goals helps.

What I don't understand is why so many psychopaths seem driven to hurt people, very much on purpose. So many of them take huge risks to do so, and end up dead or in jail. If you really don't feel anything, why bother? I personally couldn't be bothered to go through all that trouble. I couldn't care less about what other people are feeling, most of the time, so why would I be thrilled by negatively effecting their feelings? The only time I've ever considered doing anything destructive is when I actually did feel something, and it made me angry.

I've met a couple of people who seem to be close to 0 on the empathy scale, and I have to admit I avoid them because I don't want to bother with a "showdown"... boring, lame. They really get off on that stuff, though. I don't get it. Could it be that they're trying to force themselves to feel something, anything, by creating extreme feelings in others? Seems somewhat paradoxical...

They're never as clever as they think they are, the 0s. It's really not difficult to manipulate people who are above 70 on the scale, anyone can do it, and lots of "normal" people do it as well. Don't feel too special on that count.

Anonymous said...

negatively affecting*

Anonymous said...

I have a question, would a psychopath want to be able to feel love? i mean love can hurt more than anything, yet its worth it... so the happiness must be so strong. love can make you blind, but they say ignorance is bliss? if you try to think objective, do you not envy somethings from a "normal" person?

Anonymous said...

It has only been the past few years that I have been wondering about myself, and the problems that always seem to pop up. One of my recent ex's was trying to help me figure out my past and current issues I have been dealing with. All fingers have been pointing at secondary psychopathy. I would like to chat with someone who knows about a secondary psychopathy. I haven't talked to any doctors, and I don't think I will either. No reason as far as I am concerned.

Anonymous said...

Anyone....^

Hank said...

I think that's why so many socios call each other fake even when it's obvious even to the normals who are real sociopaths and psychopaths. It's the intelligent ones who know and the ones who get the info to know what to look for.

Kenmeer livermaile said...

Empathy is great for some things, lousy for others. Mammals developed high empathy, most of them, so it's a majority trait, and psychos suffer and cause grief because their minority gift goes against the majority grain.

Psychopathy obviously has survival advantage, otherwise you guys wouldn't be 1-4% of the population. But empaths and socios do';t know how to get along in mutually beneficial symbiosis. Not in a way they can both understand in a mutually balanced manner.

And the label thing sucks. Psychopath, empath, normal, abnormal, whatever. If you can;t define the specific characteristics and how they function, the label you apply to aphenomenon is basically a tag indicating a zone of ignorance.

IN this sense, the question Am I A Sociopath is kinda stupid. More accurate would be: how much empathy do I have in relation to what I encounter on average from the people I've met, and what does that mean? How does it affect me and them??

Mikki said...

WOW!!! This blog site is GREAT. Very infomative and definitely needed. Please continue to post articles and blogs. It is no doubt helping alot of people who come in contact with sociopaths and psychopaths. Everyone is different and better understanding is good.

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure if what i feel is remorse and empathy or if i am paranoid about getting caught misbehaving. Example: my cat chewed my new and expensive headphones so i put it in my shower then blew it off with my (loud) aircompressor until i actually got it to shit itself which was pretty funny the way it forced its tail against its asshole to keep the shit from coming out. and my brother caught me in the act. I felt quite a bit of fear sorta because he wines and tells my parents when i drink(still only 17), smoke dope, steal, whatever. Is that fear remorse or just fear of getting caught. Isnt remorse just regretting an action whatever the reason or does remorse come from actually feeling guilty? I fit in with people quite well with the exception of my family so i cant be a sociopath but i dont know for sure if i am even a psychopath.

Anonymous said...

I have looked around a lot of websites trying to see other peoples definitions of the terms psychopath or sociopath and they have pretty much said the same thing as a lot of you on here have said about people like that not having any feelings of remorse for anything they say or do to others, or blaming others for their actions. I have been married to a man like that for over thirteen years and we have three children together. It didn't really start to show until a little less than four years ago when I had been re diagnosed with epileptic seizures and I found myself on that day not worrying about what the seizures did to me but about what it was going to cost him for the medical treatment and from what I have seen in him since then I was right to be worried as he has threatened me physically plus I believe that he has drugged me for sex at least once. All of the signs were there but I didn't get tested, because he is my husband and the father of my children. I am however learning to be very cautious about what I take from him as far as drinks he offers me. Only two other people know that I have suspected this of him. A lady from our church and our ten year old son, but he doesn't really understand what it means at that age.

Strafe said...

That's funny,I don't care about empathy,physical strength is what matters to me most.Of course I'm not implying that if one lacks intellect and comprehension but has lots of strength is stronger,but in general that is what matters the most,in the ultimate scenario it is one of the crucial aspects of survival.

It's funny how my research has brought me to this topic of psychopathy in general.

Of course I don't support bragging about it,but the mere fact that I'm writing about it contradicts with itself,but for obvious reasons I can say it here.

Which brings me to my second point.You see,I don't mind psychopaths,I find them interesting and am glad that I can get in contact with them,to expand my knowledge and satisfy my curiosity.

That is to say if a 35 year old psychopath who is overweight and unhealthy can brag about being better then most people angers me.And the fact that psychopaths,well I hate speaking in general but,think they are better then others diminishes my opinion on them and makes me take them less seriously.That is one trait that I'd like to see them fix.

Also I do get about what you were talking about the term itself.Psychopath,or good/evil are merely terms that we use to better understand,or explain what is accepted in society.We should all be aware of that,but sadly we are not.

Which makes me talk about god,that is to say,I don't believe in god,spirits,soul,etc.Which would make me an atheist,but I consider myself one,it is foolish to label people like that.But then again,in terms would make me one by popular belief

Strafe said...

*don't consider myself one,to make things clear

Anonymous said...

How did you stop? What was the motive clearly its not because you felt bad? (trying to understand how you mod. bad behavior and why) Are you incarcerated?

Anonymous said...

Of course we can feel bad... its just very short-lived, or is it that we mimic feeling bad so well and are even lying to ourselves? Arent we all just fake anyway? Life is an act. Put your mask on and go to work. So boring.

Kenmeer livermaile said...

"Arent we all just fake anyway? Life is an act. Put your mask on and go to work. So boring."

Fake vs sincere is such a limited perspective. One can paste on a phony smile for the most altruistic of motives. Great marriages that last decades do a lot of this. Sincere fakery, in which the phony smiler sublimates his genuine annoyance in order to promote harmony in which that oh so pleasant feeling of shared love can continue to flow.

Some masks are more congruent between intent and expression than others. A predator's smile flashes teeth that intend to bite. A symbiont's smile flashes teeth that might want to bite but won't because symbionts know that to eat the one they love is to eat themselves, because their empathy will devour them with compassionate guilt.

Anonymous said...

Let's do a little poll here. Please list all of the qualitites you possess which make you "good." According to you, of course. Set aside what society deems good, and simply state the traits you possess that YOU feel justify your belief in your "goodness."

Please reference yourself at the start as either "Psychopath" or "Non."

Tempest said...

Non.

Can a psychopath recognize another one? Are they willing to collude within a community to maintain a control/fear over it?
If a mother is psychopath, what is the likelihood that a daughter will seek one out - knowing full well WHAT it is - but in the same way as woman write letters to murders in prison, seek out the psychopath to try to 'teach' it emotional responses?

Tempest said...

Non. Anonymous poll response.

Altruism - we have it and to a certain degree, have it in all facets of our lives. They do not seem too...everything is FOR them, even their 'kindness' - oneday, will be used against you by them.

Anonymous said...

There's one important thing I think people need to understand.

It doesn't really make sense to suppose that psychopaths are some kind of 'next stage of evolution.' In fact, evolution isn't really happening in the human population right now in terms of natural selection.

Some argue that there are some forms of evolution still happening in the human population, but they have everything to do with fertility, and nothing to do with "superior" humans.

Even if psychopaths were "superior" there is no evolutionary process by which they would replace empathic humans, because there is nothing making them more likely to reproduce than empathic humans.

While it is possible that psychopaths could be reproducing more often, there is really no convincing evidence that their numbers are increasing. Any evidence for it can not really be trusted because it is more likely to be accounted for by the evolution of psychology, and new ways of diagnosis (similar to the alleged increase in autism).

Basically the belief that psychopaths are some superior next stage of evolution can ONLY be explained as delusional, as someone who is truly as intelligent and "clear headed" as psychopaths claim to be would be able to see that there they are not "using logic" when they come to a conclusion that they are the next stage of human evolution.

The reality about psychopaths is that there is more to them then just having no conscious. They are not particularly reasonable. They are bad at structured thinking, and bad at planning ahead. There is a whole mode of uniquely human thinking and feeling that they are disconnected with.

And it's perfectly in line with a psychopath's M.O. to create a blog trying to help you "understand them." But 100% of the time, the purpose would be to manipulate readers. The truth is, psychopaths don't care if you understand them. If the author of this blog really cares about being understood, then he is not really a psychopath.

So here are my personal beliefs on the subject. I don't hate psychopaths or consider them evil, because obviously they did not choose to be psychopaths. But the fact of the matter is that true psychopaths are pretty much always harmful to others. I think it's pretty clear that if one day, everyone became a psychopath, humanity would not be elevated to a more logical and scientific state. Instead, it would be truly Darwinian, and most likely humanity would be reduced to something more like what we consider a species of wild animal. This is the only thing that can happen in a world of 7 billion predators without conscience. Only an empathic species can create a civilized society. Psychopaths only have incentive for instant gratification, and to feel the constant rush of defeating others. Many psychopathic "intellectuals" have actually forged their credentials as a way to defeat others.

But I also believe psychopaths are not really a threat. They are not superior and they're not growing in number. They're a sad parasitic mutation, and if we all start to learn what they are and stop being manipulated by them, we'll find that they're nothing more than a minor nuisance.

And if anyone finds this insensitive, don't worry. I cannot hurt any psychopaths feelings, because they don't have feelings to be hurt. If you are a psychopath and you feel personally hurt by this, then consider yourself cured. You are no longer (and never have been) a psychopath. Please stop validating them by using their name.

Anonymous said...

Its weird really, I do have empathy and emotions I am not a robot, so I cant be a psychopath.

I am almost always at odds with the leftists and bleeding heart liberals. I am almost certain at some point in the future they are going to use there big government to hunt you guys down and BAG, TAG Kill or contain (and that really depends on how much power they get). Thats funny really because thats what I would do, without losing a wink of sleep about it and I am not even a psychopath and thats the weird part about it.

Anonymous said...

I am genuinely surprised that I am not a psychopath and even disappointed (if you really want to know the truth). If I actually wrote out what I really thought I think it would actually make me feel alittle bad for a while

V. said...

Anon 4:49PM,

Take a look at this video and then read the comments Zhawq posted (if the guy hasn't removed them). He explains exactly why it isn't weird at all that you could see a minority of people get inhumanely treated if what you've learned about them is that they're evil.

This is why (Zhawq says that) normal empathic people can be much more dangerous than psychopaths, because you can be manipulated into committing atrocities via your emotions. A psychopath would demand to get a good reason and then see for himself if what he was told was true.

And because psychopaths aren't afraid of thinking in uncontroversial ways and aren't afraid of being different or saying unpopular things.

I don't think society ever will eradicate psychopaths completely and make society completely peaceful and full of people who are always nice and never do anything selfish and so on. But if it happened I don't think people would like it because it would be the worst tyranny humanity has ever seen.

Zhawq can explain it better - he says he's gonna write an article about it. Just wanted to say what I think also.

V.

V. said...

P.S. I'm not a psychopath.

V.

Christina said...

Anonymous said:

"I'm not sure if what i feel is remorse and empathy or if i am paranoid about getting caught misbehaving."

You should talk to Zhawq, send him an email. He can almost hundred percent sure tell you if it's empathy or selfishness and he can explain it to you too.

I'm not a psychopath but have had a psychopath in my life and I wrote to Zhawq after I had followed his blog for some time.

And he helped me even though I have extremely sensitive emotions - I'm an empath, but I'm not reading minds, just very tuned into other people everywhere I am. So since he's an expert on psychopathy, and a psychopath himself, I felt he was the best to ask.

And he was. Just my two cents. But I think you deserve to know where you stand. I feel that you're not a psychopath but I'm not an expert, and I know psychopaths can seem different from how they really are, so I have to be very careful about saying what I think.

I would ask Zhawq if I was you.

God bless,
Christina.

Tempest said...

Christina - only one thing is certain about a Psychopath and especially one that proposes to help 'us': They cannot be trusted. Especially Shark. Shark gives very little away but receives alot in return. We must be careful about what he says and importantly what we give him in return for his scraps. Be in NO DOUBT - Shark is trying to fine tune his deception - trying to find out HOW they figured out what he is.
Shark is not being completely honest (the little tit bits he does reveal are interesting). A little test for our pet Psychopath: What did you think of The Psychopaths Bible?

Tempest said...

Psychopaths are increasing in numbers. The entire Judeo-Christian tradition was based on their removal from the gene pool. Let's take a look at which of the following apply to our psychopath:
I am the LORD thy God √
Psychopath, you are not a God. At best you are a dog trainer. We are dogs aren't we?
Thou shalt have no other gods√
Do not give in to Satanic forces or desires of Self. Demonic possession crosses the mind of all mental health workers.
No graven images or likenesses√
Shark - weapons, trophies or notches for you?
Not take the LORD's name in vain√
Do not deny God or deny him. Had a talk with psychopath about God lately?
Remember the sabbath day √
Take a day off stoning them to death at the city gates
Honour thy father and thy mother√
Raising a psychopath is hard/useless. Stone them now.
Thou shalt not kill√
Obvious, but driving people to suicide is still murder. Most people do not realise suicides are frequently the result of the psychopath
Thou shalt not commit adultery√
mmm... psychopaths are a bit amoral
Thou shalt not steal√
Famous for this
Thou shalt not bear false witness√
One of the psychopaths favorite tools of trade
Thou shalt not covet√
The core of the psychopaths desire to destroy what they do not have

Remove any religious connotation from these principles and the secular values of society remain. There is no point in sweeping up a broken cup and storing it - we throw it away don't we.
The psychopath is in a state of arrested development - the secret to destroying a psychopath is finding the mental age where the development ceased (Shark appears to be a little older than the average whack job) they do not develop beyond the insecurity and fear of the teenager - or child. The frontal cortex - atrifies without use and the function of R-complex brain takes over. They are in effect - snakes. Paranoid snakes.
Through the veil of anonymity of this blog, Sharks paranoia levels are kept in check - I have already been assessed as either: Victim (useful "friend") | Target (try to use and turn into a victim) | Threat (targeting and victimisation failed, must be eliminated). Why eat the honey when the honey attracts tastier morsels? This blog is the honey.

The shark circles before it bites. Go on - bite.

Anonymous said...

Actually, all of you need to simply read this, I believe this must be the most truthful piece of writing there can be:

www.fayesnyder.com/MadeNotBorn.pdf

Tempest said...

Read it. Disagree completely with it. Tempest suspects the author is a Democrat voting Lesbian who subscribes to the 'poor psychopath, it's not your fault - mommy did it' idealistic approach to all things evil (Evil cannot exist innately ergo environment is responsible). Geez the preconceived starting point to the paper could hardly have been more obvious.

The twin studies and sibling studies do not bear out the authors 'nurture hypothesis' at all: Mommy does not raise a cluster of psychopaths as would be expected if the authors juvenile synopsis to raising vampires/psychopaths/serial killers is to be taken seriously). A myriad of other disorders perhaps maybe present in the siblings (if mom really was a whack job in her own right) - but rarely, if ever , a cluster of the pesky parasites. Siblings of the psychopath are more often than not the second tier 'victims' of the psycopath: second only to mom & dad. (perhaps Shark could elaborate on the extent of his estrangement from family).

History is full of examples of individuals that may exhibit many of the factors that determine the psychopath. The French always had a full house at a guillotine execution. The Romans too flocked to a crucifixion and sold out the Colosseum for a cruel spectacle weekly. The lack of empathy, guilt, fear - was in fact no more interesting than the abattoir worker killing meat for the masses dinner plates. History too is full of examples of horrific hedonism: Marquee de Saude and almost all the Roman Caesars - and this is not even going as far back as the Mayans human sacrifices and torture or the blood lust of other much older pagan civilisations. Psychopaths they were not - and nor was Jeffrey Dharmer. Grotesque sexual deviancy and hedonism pales in comparison to the psychopath - who may never have killed anybody or if they have, may not have defiled their prey. The psychopath is far, far more darker than even the most despicable examples of the HUMAN condition.

Shark, I believe has been asked previously about his murders - mostly left unanswered. I would like to know - did you know them (or believe you knew them) either socially or by stalking - before coming to the belief they were a threat to you (paranoia) or at least - believed that their deaths served a greater purpose to extol/enhance your grandiosity? I am I correct that you toyed with them first - frightened them - let them know you were watching/predatory? Either by 'magically thinking' or physically.

James said...

Many humans believe psychopaths have one personalty. Emphatic people have many personalities. So many of you believe you know so much about psychopaths because you'v read all the books and websites. most of the information you acquire is not fully true.

You poorly judge people with abstract concepts and methods. Your not even away of other personalities. there are those that don't feel emotions and do things for certain reasons, those people aren't psychopaths because they are different. there are so many reason you can view a person to have a certain personality, yet you still use a psychopath check lest.

Why do you use a check lest? Were psychopaths, not dogs. We adapt, are so called "mask" some were a mask others put on personalities, and others emit energies while wearing a personality, so that people who feel other peoples emotions will not be able to notice them. Some of you believe you know a psychopath wen you talk with a person.Most of the time it's not a psychopath.

Once you have seen one you believe you have the ability to see them all and know the type of life form they are. Most of you are wrong. People have morals and emotions which effects there thoughts and that effects there actions and inactions.Psychopaths don't have morals and emotions , which effects there thoughts, actions , and inactions. There is nothing more to it than that. Humans have many personalities and those who don't have emotions and morals, are not limited to one personality. They simply do not have emotions and morals.

Some psychopaths play games with others because it's more entertaining to play games with restrictions than just easily winning because your not bound to one playing style. For example. Do i want to win a foot race? Yes i do, but do i want to teleport to the fish line? No because teleporting is far to fast. Ill be bored again with in 2 seconds. I don't get pleasure from gloating how i teleportid to the finish line. Dose that mean it's the same for all psychopaths? NO it dose not. some psychopaths enjoy gloating. We dont all play games

So many people think psychopaths are only entertained wen hurting people. If you purifier something than you say it's good. if you disprove, you say it's bad. those are your opinions, not every one ellsis. If i find my human emotional friend a great partner just because I want to do it to learn how to find people for others and get them to find that they like etch other , just so i can improve my skills, dose that mean I did something bad or evil? No it dose not.

Stop being easily food. you make it far to easy for me and i become so bored that i no longer want any type of relationship with you and purposely do things to push you away or giving you reason to believe you see me a psychopath. Just so i can see if i can get are relationship back or how long will it take foe you to leave . Some times so i can let my body tell me i should be mad that im losing you. So then i can dramatically increase my rage so i can have an Adrienne burst.

Tempest said...

Actually all of you need to read this - much more current research, without the 'it's mommy's fault' bias: http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2011/11/111122230903.htm

Anonymous said...

Nobody knows what others think, therefore we can't say 'We all think such and such'. I don't think psychopaths are dumb or all covered in tattoos etc. They are extremely intelligent and calculcating people who more often than not, hold high paying white collar positions.

Anonymous said...

I don't think it's a choice at all. Just like people who are gay or whatever, we are born the way we are and there's no 'changing' people. In a way I actually envy a person not having to deal with emotional suffering, remorse, regrets, anxiety etc. But I wouldn't like to live like that my whole life, just experience it for a little while.

Matylka Demlová said...

Hello. I find it very interesting, this kind of self-reflexion most people doubt psychopaths to be able to. I think I can talk about psychopaths a bit because being kind of "involved".

Here is my (long!) story:

I had a boyfriend (and I know I was stupid, so you don't have to tell me) - who very probably was a psychopath. He was systematically gaining my attention and trying to be very confidential. I thought of him as of a very good friend. This he didn't like at all, as he told me later. One day I realized that something more draws me to him. I took a deep breath and told him I'm actually in love with him and that I know he probably isn't interested. The truth was the opposite. The first days were - I can't say beautiful - but more like ... easy. In the beginning he told me: "Oh, you're so cute nobody can actually get angry even if you do something wrong." This was a sentence I stuck to and it was also a mistake. Too late I realized that angry I got him after the first month or even earlier very, very often. But I didn't realized what his "plans" were - later, when I managed to abandon him, I realized, I was really kind of a victim. He first started to blame my parents. I have a small brother who I had to take care of quite often, my parents had lots of work and he needed to be looked after. He kept on saying I don't ever spend time with him and that my brother is their child, not mine, so i don't have to take care of him. These were things that made me always very angry, but I never responded, just shook my head. This went on for a half of year when he started to talk bad of my friends, too. He was trying to isolate me totally from everyone just so he could be the source of the only truth. He was also trying to persuade me about not going to the university. I think he was perfectly aware of what he was and what he was doing. Always when he saw that he might lose his victim, he started to treat me very good and tell me things that would please me - just to bring my reason to sleep again. My mother was very anxious about this - I never told anybody, but she was suspicious and knew something bad is going on and it has to do something with him. I always defended him; I was his perfect shield and he could be content. He also made me feel he watches me all the time even if it's very unlikely. I became paranoid and so afraid of him that I didn't dare to do anything, tell anything. He gained total power over me and I danced as he wanted me to. He treated me like the last rubbish in the world and called me names, lied to me, made me almost leave my parents and other terrible things. He never hit me, though, that was something he was too clever to do. The thing about "revelation" and reason why I think he was aware of what he is was one evening we were watching a film. By the way, I really recommend this movie - it's called Él and it's made by Luis Buñuel. There were simply too many similarities - he told me he wanted to enter the monastery if I leave him, he was so much jealous, always suspecting me, always. He would go mad for a slight reason. When we watched it, he started to tremble and kept on saying "Now you know me, now you know me, I'm him, I am El..." he was just out of his mind.

Matylka Demlová said...

About that time he also told me I surely hate him and that once I would surely find someone younger (he was six years older than me), more intelligent and more attractive. I had a really good friend at school (which was the last place he couldn't enter - it was my world, I started to love school in a way) which lived very near to my house. We once met him when we went out and he said hello to me. My boyfriend immediately started to be very angry and ask me everything about him. It was a terror. Nevertheless, some time after that he had to leave for a week or two. I felt I really can't make this anymore. I was so baffled, I didn't know what I was doing so I never realized that this friend of mine cares for me a little too much just for a friend. One day we just got together. My psycho was coming in a few days and I was really afraid, but I did it - I split with him. First he was angry, but when I told him it's because of someone else, he ceased to try. I think it was because he found he had no more control over me. It's nearly 4 years and I still have nightmares - however I'm still with the boy I was talking about and I'm so grateful for his patience. We never argue and still get along very well. God bless him. So this is my experience with a psychopath. I never thought about psychopaths before, but I learned some psychology in my school and there I found it. I realized that one of his favourite was projection; everything he ever reproached me was exactly what he was doing to me. I rarely really did things he told I did. My therapist also confirmed the fact he could be a psychopath. For three years I wanted him to burn in hell but now I just don't care. I'm only waiting for the nightmares to go away. They always scare me to death.

Anonymous said...

thanks matylka, quite interesting to see the grass from the other side. He may not have known what he was doing very conciously, just acting on his feelings and learnt behaviours.

Anonymous said...

As a kid I used to abuse others. Physically, mainly. There was this one boy who was quite short yet very proud of himself. He thought he was stronger than me and tried to prove that when the chance was given. I'm a female, by the way. Things always ended the same way: me half-strangling him and smiling in my superiority...or kicking him in the balls, which made him cry multiple times. He was too proud to go to teachers though. He did that only once. Not that it mattered. I don't know why I wrote this here, but oh well. Interesting site, I've been enjoying it very much so far.

Brianna Blackburn said...

Hello, I am an empath and divorced a psychopath . We have a 1 year old child together who he has never done a single thing for during our marriage unless in public . I read through the comments and I didn't see anyone comment about p/s 's pathologically lying?

My question is do they even know they are lying or do they believe it? If they know they are lying , they justify it, correct?

The thing with my ex is he is in TOTAL denial and projects everything on to me. He even kidnapped our child for a month, he is a "professional victim" and feels he doesn't exist without attention ,and must keep up a facade. He even said to me " I really feel bad for you and hope you get the help you need." - Projecting on me like crazy, as usual.

Another thing I didn't see mentioned is in the beginning and the course of the relationship with psychopaths , they mirror you , and emulate you.

Generic Name Here said...

"they mirror you , and emulate you."

You just gave yourself half of the answer to your own question. Personally, I've had bouts of uncontrollable lying, with no REAL reason to. Most times the words just come flooding out, and the next thing I know, I have what I wanted. I can't speak for most, but your ex sounds, not so much like a P/S, but no way to know without more detail. I never had to justify my lying, because it justified itself with the consequences that it rendered.

In response to your line that I quoted, which is what I actually was wanting to talk about for a moment, you basically gave him everything you felt, and he acted on that under the guise of the wonderful, unmistakable man of your dreams, until such time that he considered the relationship boring, yes? He sounds like he'd be fun at a game of mental twister. ^_^.

I wonder, though, how did it make you feel to go through the divorce proceedings? Will you let your child know who it's father was? Is?

Anonymous said...

Gday
could someone please tell me if any of the following traits exclude me from being a psychopath-

- I have very sensitive feelings, and basically want to be able to satisfy my emotional needs through people, but pretty well always end up feeling rejected/offended/dissatisfied. I wonder if it is inevitable.

While I do care what some people think for various reasons, I am not going to care about anyone or anything unless is due to cause /affect.

I can understand people pretty well, can understand their position, but feel people don't understand me at all. Ironically, people tend to think they do get me, and I only feel misunderstand.

I thin the fact that I have strong and sensitive feelings, and that I am easily scorned and become angry and apathetic would indicate I must be sociopathic over psychopathic, or maybe just antisocial ???

I don't lack feelings, I just feel diffently to most people on many many things.Any thoughts ??
Cheers

Anonymous said...

Just read the disclaimer, good one Zhawq, you had me going there; And to think that you were a psychopath; "All illegal acts described in the texts within the domain of Psychopathic Writings, psychopathicwritings.com are to be understood as purely fictitious. No likeness with real or fictional characters or events are intended, and should be understood as accidental" my hat off to you, my hat off.

Anonymous said...

"Rather I am actually trying to see things from the normal individuals perspective, I'm trying to learn! And if I sometimes find it hard to see anything new, or especially 'good' in the ways of how normal people live and function, I can't see that as being only due to a fault of my own.
Both sides have flaws, normal people aren't saints!"

I like that. I understand and agree with you. (I'm not a psychopath.)

1 - Would it be possible for you to fall in love, to really want someone by your side, and to really want to "learn" how to please that person?

2 - When you're manipulating someone, do you always have an idea of what you're doing, do you have an idea that the other person may see (or feel) that as being harmful, or do you just do that because you're used to?

Thanks!
Rachel

Drew said...

This is a fantastic effort. Thanks for this blog.
I actually feel I have many psychopathic tendencies, but I also have empathy. It's the way I deal with the empathy. I can only take so much hypersensitivity then I completely shut down. People are always confused by me as one minute I'm super caring and another I'm cold as ice.

And I can tell you that I'm not doing it on purpose, though I am great at talking and manipulation when I want to be , but I don't think that's the way to go.

I think there has been so much error about the human psyche and movies like Halloween and Docs on Manson and Bundy don't help. These are all select cases.

The thing is, I think if a psychopath "shuts down" his /her feelings then great trouble can ensue. But its also easy to switch back and forth. Shut down, alive, shut down, etc.

When I was young I put my hand on a hot stove to see what it felt like. Contrary to the implied retardation some would assume, I actually was smart enough at a young age to know there's a big difference between experience and being told something. I'm also incredibly alert and cautious due to such early behavior. So to say my early behavior was stupid may not be the wisest analysis.

I also never felt guilt, but I felt strongly that Guilt wasn't something that actually needs to be and it's an immature race that relies on guilt. But then I hurt someone (not physically) close to me - so close it was the same as hurting myself. It still hurts to this day and I desperately try to figure out a way to resolve it - I want to make her better so I'm better. So now I know guilt - or some degree of it.

Any of these "disorders" are happening, I believe, because we are evolving as a race. That's why more and more are appearing. It does not mean the race is going to start killing each other like some crazed Halloween movie. But sometimes, as they say, you have to crack eggs to make an omelette. (however that goes)

Anyone who understands certain psychopathic tendencies can most likely tell that I have this from my writing here. Also, dont mistake this as narcism - believe me it's not the same as I think I know a narcissist disorderly.

But even taking time to type words correctly or express fluently drives me crazy.

Anyway - I, I ,I :) Great Blog

Anonymous said...

The psychopath loves the borderline vulnerability and knows how to push the buttons, I also know that the psychopath at his core is weak in character, as I can step up and be honest as he demands truth, but he cannot do this at all no matter how easy it is made for him and pathologically lies. I see this as weak as if a woman can do this and a man to afraid to me he is weak. Does he know this deep down inside? He is business naraisist Psychopath, I point out all these things in him but I wonder if it all bounced off, or as he is smart can' he see the truth but won't admit it to me?

Anonymous said...

It it strange as all a borderline speaks is truth and all a narcisistic psychopath speaks is lies, we keep trying to make them honest, fearing being abandoned we put up
With their crap. It gets to the point where u realise u never knew who they were and that's scary, they have no moral fibre but demand respect. When a feeler liner a borderline cannot respect a person like this the conflict starts, the hardest part is knowing that u wasted ur time with a fraud. A fraud is not to be respected, they hide themselves. Why do they believe they are worthy of respect when they are too afraid to show their real face. I think that underneath that thick defence they psychopath fears 'imploding' should he look in the mirror and face who he really is. To me that is weak, they see things all the wrong way. Sadly they do so much damage due to their inferiority and I wish it wasn't so. They are so scare to 'see' themselfs their defences are like armour. The worst part for them, as they cannot acknowledge their flaws they can never grow and evolve as people. They stay stuck and handicapped, never truly learning from experience and painful emotions. They thing superior but the miss out on life as the rest of the world knows it to be. They just exist and harm. Are they human? Is evolution hopefully weeding them out as if they do not evolve, how do these people better mankind? I would love to see a narcisistic psychopath truly face himself and the ugly truth but that is impossible. They would fake it. They lack the courage of even a small child. I am shocked by what I have seen, and feel angry re other victims. Is there any way to beat these guys or is it futile?

Anonymous said...

There are studies showing that psychopaths are usually capable of "turning on" empathy. It's just not our natural state of being.

Anonymous said...

Hello I hope some psychopaths read this as I don't think I'm neurotypical either but have a different perspective on life to psychopaths.

Empathy is not real, I agree. It requires you to have the feelings first and those feelings can be seen as 'weaknesses' and that explains how psychopaths see themselves as better than those that show feelings.

I happen to have a very low neuroticism rating. In other words, things don't bother me much so people perceive that I am being rude at times as I don't react to their unease and don't generally follow any social rules and just act naturally with no agenda at all. Psychopaths might find this idea incredulous but seriously I don't lie or manipulate at all as this is only a consequence of having some goal to accomplish when interacting with others which I never do in general.

So what normally happens is that psychopaths go mental trying to figure me out as all competitive people can't really win with me as I don't compete. I also see everyone as an equal and don't see things as worse or better than anything else as this is mostly socially constructed too (although it feels very real to most people and makes up what the world is to them). The reason how the world seems so real with all these comparisons is that most people are actually scared of the lesser of every comparison and this causes the normal erroneous thinking known as splitting (black and white rather than shades of grey thinking) which comes with every thought that has any negative connotation.

Psychopaths view the world in a similarly erroneous way but this is due to higher average dopamine levels in general which is needed to compensate for repressed fear. Dopamine will reduce your awareness of your life from an holistic sense to a very focussed sense (it is generally deals with anticipatory feelings and having something that needs to be accomplished so you are never at rest so to speak). So those with high dopamine will all become more selfish naturally at the cost to their life expectancy since the dopamine is needed to counteract stressors in their life as psychopaths in particular don't have any other ways of reducing stress such as love that neurotypicals can use. The illusion is that they are more powerful the more dopamine they have and subjectively they will have more stress tolerance but they don't realise they continually need this as they don't have normal fear control mechanisms and have to repress it. Testosterone is another hormone that reduces stress and is also a precursor to dopamine but also includes cortisol (dopamine can be raised without raising cortisol but if testosterone is involved it will also increase cortisol).

Anonymous said...

Now the interesting thing is that with neurotypicals, cortisol will reduce their feelings of love and connection with others. Showing and receiving love and connection with others will have the opposite effect and reduce cortisol and stress. BUT with extreme psychopaths, they are so damaged that love and connection (i.e. EQUALITY with others) will actually cause them stress as they must totally repress this in their mind to prevent enormous pain. Most psychopaths may not be this bad and compartmentalise things a bit more but generally they view the world very irrationally as they can't stand EQUALITY just as a scientist can't stand IRRATIONALITY they also have a misguided view of the world.

The fact is the to have a more valid holistic and less selfish view view of the world you need BOTH: LOW DOPAMINE + LOW CORTISOL
and love will be truly selfless and you won't get attached to others. Paradoxically for low dopamine if you also have low cortisol with it, you will feel very powerful and untouchable and will seem to know naturally what to do at every moment without needing to consciously think about it.

Some people have enough oxytocin receptors through peaceful and loving experiences that they can easily accomplish this very easily. Psychopaths don't have the need for this receptor and therefore can never be properly stress free and at peace. This peace they must avoid at all costs and they actually feel despairing when they see it! Most psychopaths will probably have limited oxytocin action but this will only function in a dopaminergic way rather than a holistic and peaceful way.

Anonymous said...

A continuation to the above is that where psychopaths can be seen as generally destroyers of life, people like those above can be seen as healers. They are not usually generally liked as they tend to bring everyone's fears out in the open which is quite different to most neurotypicals who are scared to upset people due to misplaced empathy.

Dopamine levels on the lower end are needed for this behaviour but they tend to rise and fall naturally as needed without conscious thought. When approaching people such as psychopaths their dopamine rises substantially as if they are on drugs and they tend to get attracted to these types. The psychopaths sees this as them wanting to be attached to their perceived power but this could not be further from the truth- as these healer types just want to help everyone and want to face as much fear as they can even if it's almost a lost cause. They may even get involved in work that people see as 'unethical' in order to fix that perception in people since they don't see anything intrinsically wrong with anything.

Psychologically if someone sees you as lesser than them even subconsciously (i.e. due to lower dopamine or not following normal rules) any perceived threat from you is reacted to more strongly than someone perceived as more equal in the first place. So this behaviour I described above as healing can actually bring out a lot of hate and fear in people but this is needed anyway for any healing to occur.

The way this healing can occur with neurotypicals is once they are angry at you (they have lost power in their eyes) you then show them love and equality. Most of the time they are surprised that you do this when you have what they see as the 'power' and they see a glimpse of real love. This is not something you will think about consciously but will come naturally. Of course, psychopaths will just be confused by the whole thing as they are scared of this love and cannot really be healed in most cases.

Anonymous said...

Psychopaths aren't much of a problem for these healers as psychopaths may be driven crazy and not understand them but realise they are harmless in any case and give up on them.

Borderlines are the worst of the lot for these healer types to get involved with in close relationships at least. It's very hard for a borderline to face their problems and they will basically try to consume the healer and not let go. The borderline will be driven crazier and try all sorts to keep the relationship while zapping the healer's energy. Special understanding of the condition is needed for any success but that's another story.

Zhawq said...

You're right that psychopaths often get puzzled by people who are truly benevolent and have absolutely no second or hidden agenda. I've seen this and experienced it when I was younger.

I also understand what you say about BPDers, it's not entirely untrue, to say the least. To a psychopath they can be fun and even good company, though.

Anonymous said...

"This. SO much this. Now people call that Narcissism, as if knowing I'm a better person somehow needs a pathology connected to it. If I am superior with using logic and knowing how people tick, and have an objective view on most things, does that make me mental?

NO!

That makes me clear headed. That makes me superior. That makes the best person at what I do.

I'm not mentally challenged, I was born with a superior genetic predisposition, and any naysayer's opinion otherwise means fuck all to me."

first off, nobody thinks that psychopaths are 'mentally challenged'. second, if you define 'better/superioir person' as 'person who is better at working towards their own financial/social/etc. advantage', being a psychopath makes you a better person. but most people don't see it that way. in my book, a superior person is a person that is better at pursuing their objectives (the objectives being what the person actually WANTS, i.e. what makes them happy) than another person. empathy doesn't impair that ability (it does in some cases, but provides advantages in others) , it changes the objectives. a minimum-wage earning nurse is only less successful than a stock broker with a multi-million dollar pay if the stock broker is the happier person. what i am trying to say: you mistake empathy for a weakness because you only apply it to your own objectives.

a few questions(out of pure interest, not loaded with any accusations) to all psychopaths who read this:
are you capable of feeling 'schadenfreude' (= joy as a result of suffering of others), or are you completely apathetic about your fellow humans?

can you feel hatred, and if yes, for what reasons? do you hate hitler for example? or would you hate a person for killing your mother? to what extent can you feel other emotions like sadness, loneliness, happiness etc.? are those in any way impaired?

do you feel an urge to engage in social contact or do you find it bothersome?

what are your opinions on morals in general, do you think that there are certain things that are 'wrong', whatever those things may be? (more specifically: can a psychopath be homophobic or racist?)

Anonymous said...

Well I do have empathy Neurons. I can imagine what kind of effect it would have on me. If someone gets kicked in the nuts I do feel uncomfortable.

Psychopaths do have empathy ( depending on your definition of empathy ), but they do not care about other people. This is just what society expects of you. If your smart, you can see that. We are the product of society, thats what I believe.

I will tell you something funny. When I used XTC it made me into a normal person for a while. ( Took a half pill every weekend ) But when I stop using XTC I go back to psychopath me:P Empathy is a chemical thing. I recommend other pshycopaths to use XTC. To see what other people feel like:P ( only do this when your life is stable, its a real challenge )Feelings are disguisting to me, because human emotions make you weak so ive stopped using it:P

Psychopaths are the next step in evolution. Were Homo Sapiens 2.0, learn to deal with if you are a Homo Sapiens 1.0 :P

I scored 38/40 on the hare test:P

Kenmeer livermaile said...

When I read 2-dimensional thoughts like those expressed by the fellow who allegedly scored 38/40 on the Hare test, I'm reminded that it's very likely that many persons presenting here as psychopaths are poseurs of various stripe and perhaps Mr.Ms. High Score might be one, and if not, provides evidence that psychopaths are no better at thinking things through on average than your standard neurotypical.

Parasites don't evolve beyond their hosts. THey may integrate more deeply with them but they cannot exist on their own.

Anonymous said...

Interesting entry for the blog. I'll recommend you to read Andrew book "Political Ponerology", it describes a bunch of pathological personalities, between them, those who are capable of being more dangerous of a psychopath, the "characteropath".

Anonymous said...

I was called a psycho many times by many people in my childhood. Nothing ever clicked that they meant anything more than colloquial slang.

As a teenager I had people try to tell me and get me to look into it further, I did, but still couldn't relate to what the text book said.

I studied psychology with a particular interest in psychopathy and other antisocial personalities, and could only tentatively grasp that that was me, and figured it was ordinary people looking through their highly biased lenses to come to such conclusions.

Then I found first hand accounts like yours that left me with absolutely no doubt, and to my glee, I could honestly relate amd embelish this persona.

Danielle said...

I've been reading this article and the comments, and I have a question. Can a psychopath feel things such as sadness, depression, etc as a function of another medical condition?

For instance, suppose a psychopath were to get a diagnosis of cancer and told that they have six months to live. How would they react to that? If said cancer were to cause so much physical pain that a person couldn't do what they like or even leave the house, would they get upset or depressed about that? These seem like 'normal human emotions', but I think we've established that psychopaths are 'different'.

Also, would said cancer patient have empathy for others they know who are going through the same things? Unlike the 'kicked in the nuts' question, they actually *would* be experiencing the pain.

Could they experience depression as a function of a mood disorder? I have bipolar disorder; I'm usually okay, but the depression can be terrible at times. Is it even possible for someone to be both a psychopath *and* bipolar?

I hope I don't sound *too* incoherent! This site and subject is just fascinating to me.

Danielle said...

And Anonymous, I got a 53/100 on the Hare test...maybe I was just feeling cynical that day?

Anonymous said...

We adopted an teenage orphan from an orphanage in Europe. She has been diagnosed as RAD, but she is much more psychopath in everything I read. She is fourteen and handicap. She is obsessed with control in every way. She chews and spits hundreds of hairs in which she puts in shoes, clothing pockets, inside chairs, in the springs of chairs, etc. She will even mark her territory by peeing on someone's bath towel. She cares nothing about consequences and even delights if you give her a negative consequences, as much as she delights in lying and getting others in trouble. She has no emotions of any sort. Her brain scan showed the right side to almost be dead. She is quite smart in school, but almost impossible to live with. Do you have any advice?

Anonymous said...

I have aspergers and psychopathy


For example

Go fuck your self

I'm sorry

skannerz22 said...

Inferior cretin peasants are everywhere throughout this website you have no idea what it is like to really be superior.. from having homework and school work get 100% so often the teachers mark it 110% as a joke

From being a super fast runner

amazing at keyboard/piano, drums, acting, swimming, wood work, maths, English, sports, guitar, cunning and pattern matching with heightened senses and a vast range of cognitive abilities far beyond your comprehension to invalids quotes of Einstein and behavior of stefan hawkings time machine party all the way to invalidating your whole existance

Being able to manipulate people with the truth so much that you are almost immune to being thought of as a lier

To the range of memory and visual thinking of remembering your whole day as 2-3 years old

And also being able to remember 3 different visual displays of video in your head at the same time as seeing real life


Or having your memory as a GPS


Only the troubled people fully can start to see you aren't perfect but they them selves begin to be annoyed at your superiority

This is not narcism or some lie this is a bunch of facts

crushing everyone's mind through logic and tricks and truth to the point they are confused or you start to wonder

Am I human?

This is what it is like to have aspergers and psychopathy

BASICALY everything of psychopathy and aspergers

Without the misunderstanding or insanity


I am a hybrid

Good day kind sir, go fuck your self organic beings...

Anonymous said...

Perhaps there is a stronger connection between some cases of "Psychopathy" and Aspergers than you think. The way that both "conditions" are diagnosed are by the symptoms rather than the underlying cause. The symptoms of Aspergers vary depending on what sensory processing problems that person has in relation to his/her environment. So that a person with autism who has extra sensitive hearing and is not able to stand the noises of a city for instance will compensate for this by "switching off" their hearing. In the same way a person who has difficulty finding stable levels of and reference points for their emotions in the outside world might switch of some emotions due to confusion and sensory overload.

I feel that since realizing that I probably have a somewhat more autistic brain than most other people - I have been tuning back in to the sensory levels that I think I was at before blocks started being introduced. I have had times in my life where I thought I could be a serial killer, I believe that what prevented me from introducing the "sociopath" block during these times was a mix of learned moral values, bonds to people that did not depend on my emotions towards them (for instance something like unconditional love) I also had the memory of feeling empathy, and somehow a sense of obligation to remain the same person. Perhaps "true" psychopath do not have this memory? Or is memory another category of sensory processing that can be blocked?

Is this argument totally confused?

Anonymous said...

you know what? you make me sick! your type is a lowest chain in human evolution, nop... you are lower then most of the animals, just bugs are like you. I hope this world will get rid of all of you. Wait and see. You power is fake, you are a fake. What a miserable life you lead.
Publish this is you have the guts. useless living thing.

Anne said...

Am I a psychopath?

When both of my grandma died and also my father, I faked my emotions and acted like I was so sad. I wasn't happy about it but I just have no emotions about it whatsoever. I felt more like it was an obligation for me to cry as I don't want for people to think I didn't care as that is supposed to be a bad thing.

As a kid, I watched people's behaviour specially adults. I learned how they react to certain things and I manipulated them. I was very much liked by adults. I also tortured animals when I was a kid, not because it makes me happy but just out of mere curiosity.

Despite all these, I consider my self a good person even when I was a kid. Other "normal" kids would do things to hurt other people's feelings but I was extremely aware of other people's emotions and it offends me to see somebody not caring, to the point that it angers me and it would appear as though I am very compassionate.

The concept of "conscience" and "empathy" baffles me. Are we born with it or are they something learned? The reason why I asked this is because I am now a big animal rights advocate and a social activist. People consider me to be an "animal lover". People think I have an overwhelming compassion and empathy for others. They think I am selfless. I never intended to appear like this but as I grow old, I developed morals. I have a very strong desire to be a good person. I developed certain philosophies and notions of what is right and what is wrong. If other people harms another person emotionally or physically, I am greatly offended as it goes against my philosophy or accepted morals. This causes people to believe I am a very emotional and emphatic individual.

I was already 27 years old the first time I ever cried over the suffering of an animal and it greatly amazed me. I never thought something like that could make me feel an emotion so great that it would caused my tears to fall uncontrollably. It was one cat that introduced me to emotions.

Out of boredom I fed a stray cat some food. He then later moved in my apartment and fed him everyday. One day I stepped on his tail and he accidentally bit me. I was so mad I kicked him. But instead of hiding and running away from me, he ran back in front of me, there he sat on the floor looking straight into my eyes. I could sense the fear in him and he had a very apologetic look. Without him saying anything, I felt like he was saying, we are still friends, aren't we? That moment, I didn't see a cat, I saw someone just like me and for the first time I felt what people call empathy and remorse or guilt. That excruciating pain of wishing that I had never done what I did. Instantly I learned the meaning of friendship and feeling for another being. Since that day, I felt like I developed a sensory that I never had and a bridge between me and all the living beings was created.

Him and I became good friends and I felt like we understood each other very well. It was as if he was an extension of myself and I was his. And then one day he fell ill, I saw how much he was suffering and wished I could take away his pain to the point that I'd rather it be me than him. I brought him to the vet, but he died of renal failure. I grieved and cried for so many months. And as if it was some kind of miracle or curse, the world has change or I have changed. I gained the ability to feel, hear and see suffering. All of a sudden, when I see an animal, I no longer see them as I would a tree. I see them as an extension of myself. In the beginning, my blanket of compassion extends only to him, but now it extends to all animals and humans. I feel so much sadness when people suffer but I still don't feel sadness when they die. Death is not a terrible thing to me, it gives me peace to know that a being is no longer suffering.

Am I a psychopath who somehow magically became an empath or did I just developed new philosophies or standards? Is psychopathy and empathy inborn or are they both learned traits?

Kenmeer livermaile said...

Color me naive, Anne, but your experience fits in with how I think about sociopathy. Not that any old sociopath can have a conversion like you have, but that the human brain is incredibly plastic, and that an inherent lack of empathy is only that and nothing more.

"Bad" psychopaths would probably be "bad" people even if they weren't psychopathic. There are more character traits defining a person's personality than one single, if striking difference such as a lack of emotional empathy.

Using logical empathy as you have done seems to have crearted a neural pathway through which emotional empathy could travel>

Congratualtions and consolation. I believe the world is richer with compassionate love, but oh how one suffers too.

Anonymous said...

With blogs like this around I don't even need website anymore.
I can just visit here and see all the latest happenings in the
world.

Anonymous said...

is the OP still around? I absolutely love the courageous effort put forth here and the explanation and reasons behind it. This truly is a rare view into the mind of well I dont think you are a "psychopath" because that word has to much Hollywood baggage. You seem like a decent person who can't feel the pain of others and maybe you even want to?. Not exactly the hollywood indoctrination we are taught to believe. I too have been doing fairly recent research on this psychopathy the wiki version i got was something about "the disregard for the rights of others" You don't seem like someone who disregards someones personal rights. You do have an advantage, that is not good for all of us but you could be hired as a politician as all of the ones who are selected to lead are psychopaths, they do this so they don't mind accepting bribes for laws that hurt Americans.
Anyways brother I hope all is well and you aren't in any trouble.
P.S. dont let the azholes here get you down they are just lacking empathy

Wan said...

Zhawq, I am not psychopath but am interested in the inner working of psychopath. Since you're willing to bare yourself, to judge your evil/fair level (according to the 'normal' 'do unto others' moral system), would you describe how you ended up killing other people. Was it to take something from them or was it because you thought they're blocking your way or was it self defense? I know you have no regret or guilty feeling at all, but I just want to know you inner outlook whether that's a fair, necessary, it's their fault or just a nuisance or something else. If you've described it somewhere, just point to the post.

Jeff from Canada said...

Wow, amazing to find people reading this that react so strongly, in a "go kill yourself and never breed" manner, to people seeking to understand who and what they are. Personally i have just found this site and find the insights very interesting. It can be hard to examine how you yourself do things in life, but it is very easy to find what someone else describes in themselves is shared by you. Questions like "what am i" and "why am i different from these other people" are very hard to answer without outside information. Personally I dont know what type of person I am, but i do know i dont tick like most other people do. Places like this are very helpful to be able to find common threads so you can come to sound conclusions.

Anonymous said...

First, thank you very much for this article. I highly appreciate that you write about all this and explain it to such detail.

There are so many comments that I couldn't read through all of them to see if my question has already been addressed. I myself am a highly empathic person. I have been in several long lasting abusive relationships with “ordinary” PTSD and psychopathic, narcissist people... I believe now that my ability to empathize with the other person was used to satisfy wishes or desires of the other person. I simply like too much to make other people happy and I am too willing to question myself, all the time believing that the other person is honest to some degree as well as believing that noone would or could consciously induce suffering in order to manipulate. While my first relationship was with a plainly highly narcisstic but not so smart and not at all conscious person the second one was with someone who could be described as sadistic narcissist and maybe to some degree psychopathic. Although as I understand it by now psychopaths don't attach and he is (of course within his framework) an actually to some degree engaged husband and father who accepts the responsibility for his son, but at the same time his way of parenting is at many points highly abusive.

So, well, now at least I know about the notions of psychopathy, narcissism, sociopathy, and so on... I don't judge them as people. I may judge them for their actions, but in principle I don't believe that they are evil. It is just another way of existence. But I know now that these are the wrong people for me to be engaged with too closely ;) and I know how to protect myself. I can recognize them easily.

Still, we are attracted to each other. They sense my sensuality and I sense their cold minds. Even though I am empathic I can see through most things and usually I can think logically without being too much influenced by how I feel about things. That is why I like them personally. They simply see relations that other “normal” people will never see. One commenter already asked the question, why is it that psychopaths are so much attracted to empaths. You said you would write an article about it. Did you? Could you please post the link if you did? Thank you very much in advance.

So here comes my actual questions, if psychopaths are the “superior” unattached beings as you describe them in your article, then why the anger? Why the desire to destroy? Why the desire to induce pain? Desire to do something always means attachment... Are all psychopaths to some degree sadists? I don't think so. But if otherwise unattached why is there such a strong attachment to the notion of superiority? And why if you supposedly “don't” have feelings then why do so many of “you” engage in actions that are harmful to yourself and others? Where does the satisfaction come from? Is this understanding not somehow correlated to the anthropology that all humans are evil at their core if they lack god and nowadays empathy?

Anonymous said...

Another question regarding the superiority, we don't need to discuss that, but I don't think that in terms of evolution, psychopaths are more developed or superior, on contrary, I do think that collaboration is what makes societies work and allows this high degree of individualist freedom that we experience in the modern world and for collaboration working in the long term established rules and empathy are crucial.

However, maybe this is why I am asking the following question, if the silent beauty of love and nature and life in general is not available to “psychopaths” then what is what makes you strive? Is this lack of sensual experience a reason for the boredom they experience? If being not attached to anything is the root of not developing wishes and thus lacking goals and being caught by boredom again, then why this strong attachment to power and destruction? Why not be powerful by doing good and enjoying good things that grow out of your actions?

I imagine that with their clear and unattached vision psychopaths could be wonderful counsellors and friends and leaders if they could draw satisfaction from growing and have power at the same time. They would just use their power in a way that benefits others as much as it benefits themselves.

One more final question and thought. Our parenting and educational ideas were guided for a long time by the idea that in deep all humans are evil and can only forced to not act evil if the are raised with fear and punishment. We established guilt as a concept and try by all means not to feel guilty because we are afraid of punishment. Given that “psychopaths” don't experience fear and given that psychopaths are able to learn (I am 100% sure about that and all the people that say psychopaths don't learn are … whatever you may want to place here, I would say stupid idiots) what about learning, parenting, raising by encouraging and stimulating understanding instead of punishment for unwanted actions? Would that make any difference?

The core of your argumentation is that you realized early that you don't feel but can fake feelings and use that to manipulate. But we all manipulate, we are wired to learn how to get what we want. Why use it in a way that is considered “negative” by most societies?

I put here some thoughts. It became a lot. I am not sure how clear it became. I hope someone can make sense out of this and maybe give some answers or thoughts...

Anonymous said...

i think im a psycho too, i want to kill whatever it is disturbing me. i choked cats, tortured them to death when young. i never told anybody i love you, i never said im sorry.

because im not sorry

fuck that, why i be sorry anyway.

i never think im psycho , nobody think im psycho... i hide all my dirt, nobody knows how in shit i am. how evil i am.

i ask people im something is wrong with me, i ask my family, they say nothing is wrong, you are good.

im going crazy....

waseem khatri said...

This. SO much this. Now people call that Narcissism, as if knowing I'm a better person somehow needs a pathology connected to it. If I am superior with using logic and knowing how people tick, and have an objective view on most things, does that make me mental? https://www.scratchmap.org/the-scratch-map-usa-edition/

Anonymous said...

Incredible points. Solid arguments. Keep up the amazing spirit.


Also visit my web blog; robot patissier

Mira Devereux said...

This is a great post, very engaging. I'm not a psychopath, and yet I see something of myself in this. I can be so cold, so hateful, more so than others I know, but my hatred is fueled by empathy. I love the planet and all its creatures, for christ's sake my mother killed a spider in our house and I cried for hours, so when humans so willingly destroy everything they touch, that ticks me off. Humans in general disgust me, truly, and I feel superior to them in that I see society for the filth it is. I am not deluded, or tricked, I see not what they want me to see, feel not what they teach me to feel. I have a strong grip on reality, so I feel better than the majority. But unlike a psychopath may be, I feel guilty for my arrogance. I'm human too, after all, so am I not just as disgraceful?

Such a complicated feeling. I don't think psychopaths need to change, they are indeed superior beings, in my opinion. It is men who are capable of feeling but act "bad" anyway that are the true evil.

I envy you, though, in a way. Yes, life would be much easier if all the pain and evil in the world didn't get to me.

peacebreacher said...

It's as if there's some mystical invisible connection between people. One get's kicked in the nuts and goes 'OUCH!, and then the next goes 'Ugh!', wincing, and so does the next, and so on.

Further down the line someone may react to the same input even though they didn't see or hear the guy who actually DID get kicked in the nuts.

Where does it stop, this connection?

Maybe it's just that it stops earlier in people like myself?

the connection never stops.
try as you might you cannot box with god- you will lose and devils must be exposed to themselves before they might ask the aspies if they might join their esteemed ranks- thing is they cant...the aspies cannot accept the way psychopaths insist on not caring.
The word is a hideously dangerous one and in itself if used by a person against you basically means they have given up hope of you caring about them and possibly seeing the error of your ways.
the development of the empathic mirroring affect seen in most individuals bonds every one of those individuals together...when that man gets kicked in the nuts it very much matters why it happened in the first place but the situational empathy in that given place, at that given time is everything.
What was the kick in the nuts for?
how was the nutkicking situation initiated?
You can bet your life it was an uncaring self confessed psychopath who started it.
What you fail to recognise is yourself as the one potentially doing the nutkicking.
you go out for revenge however and you better dig two graves.
The difference between an aspie and a psychopath?
by their very definition there has to be a big difference, Aspies try and try and try again, knowing they never might fully succeed in developing something akin to this mirror reaction most of us are blessed with, i can say without doubt its fantastic to be alive, scientific determinism notwithstanding, look close enough with a scientific mind and god is in there - so to speak...in the beauty of a flower and its mention on a dark page - change everything and i mean everything, by any means necessary learn to love the other sentient beings as a whole philosophy. you are one of us after all and your willingness to share how you truly feel with us.
Even when you think you are stating you do not care, that act of communication is helping me to understand another soul that looks a lot like yours, tied up in science and determinism rather than liberated by it.
Be careful what you say, feel free to change your mind and apologise for the pain you have caused everyone in your bitterness.
Why not?
you really think your logic so perfect as to not escape the existential nightmare that comes from seeking too definite a label for anything?
I am not sitting here questioning am i really here at all thanks to you.
but i will refrain from further slander to your character as your introspection and thought on what you were accused of being by your doctor was the whole point of the consultation.
get a better one but do not lie to him and you may get a different and more positive diagnosis.
GOOD luck.

Robin Morrison said...

"You can bet your life it was an uncaring self confessed psychopath who started it."

While I feel that psychopaths contribute way disproportionately to the amount of cruelty in our world, especially as administered by authorities in power, compassionate people can be nasty too.

peacebreacher said...

"Nobody seems to acknowledge that empathy isn't real,"
its because it is,,,you just cant feel it for some reason.
do us a favour and give it a go- if you are only living for yourself you are already dead anyway.
because number one can never exist on its own...you need infinite possibility for the number 1 to exist at all.
















.

peacebreacher said...

stronger version of themselves

have you fucking heard this one lol.

stronger how? half a brain , no peripheral vision ands a tendency to stare into mirrors a lot???

stronger lol.
you make laugh you retards.

Anonymous said...

You could qualify me an empath because I can feel guilt and remorse. But as I am an asocial I am quite disconenected with the rest of the world.
So I might say that very often I feel nothing toward anybody, any when seeing an old lady falling on the ground until. I just feel disconnected.
So it is some sort of lack of empathy i assume. Nothing can take me out of my indifference mostly.

But when I do interact with people I try not to hurt them and I can feel more or less very disturbed when I cause pain to someone.
As I think pain is something ugly and I really feel bad at creating something ugly.
Moreover when I inflict unfairly some sort of pain that I myself experimented I feel it even more ugly and disturbing. For example, I have been violent with my sister when she was a kid but I really didn't mean. I couldn't help and then I always regret it.
I felt remorse because she is weak, and preying at the weak is something not funny for me. It was when I lacked conscience when I was a kid because I also has been violent and remorsless.
But I received such a severe education, my parents insisting about how it is unfair to inflict to people pain when they don't deserve it, and pushing me to try to imagine what its like if i tranfer my spirit in someones body to feel this pain.
And growingly I learned to be an empath.

For me, empathy is something you learn. Some people are easy to learn empathy, some are not, and some don't even got the chance to do it. I see that as a function, that our species and pehaps some other species found, in order to keep order, to increase the chances to create solidarity between individuals, making the whole group stronger. It is the tactic of the weaks as you can say. Like for the ants, communicating with chemical signals allows the whole community to know whats happening to each individual. Thats the same kind of power.
Neither it is an advantage for me, nor an inconvenient. And same ways I see the psychopaths. Lack of empathy and emotions can be a real advantage for individual pruposes mainly.
Without the same restraints obviously you can go straight to your objectives.

But the problem is that you can't make breakthrough withoutw living trails of broken heart and suffering people because you can't create a real bond with them.

I can't imagine me being alone all my life, I would die from boredom. And I admit tat I use people sometimes for selfish purpose. Like my girlfriend for having sex isn't it ?
But well if you hurt people you won't get any support from people or even love.
What I call love (but love is something who doesn't really exist in the ideal meaning...for me is it a mutual exchange more or less based on honesty and trust) is not for me something abstract.

It is a feeling, a force, an urge. Like the sexual urge, or the urge I feel to hit someone who pisses me off.
But it is an urge far more stronger. So strong that you can't help that. It is really for me something strong like a sexual urge after one year not doing sex (not that I can be that patient...but imagine that).
It is an urge to grasp someones favors, attention, emotions, personnality, to make them want voluntarily to give you without even forcing them...thats what my words want to describe.

My last girlfriend who is diagnosed psychopath told me that my lack of empathy was probably due to some sort of autism. She is probably true, I simply am not there. But when I connect with reality I do function like an empath.

If my point of view is of any use to psycho or even empath people I would be glad ;)

Bye

Anonymous said...

I found this blog when researching the murder of Merideth Kercher. Someone posted a comment made by this blog's author regarding psychopaths and their ability to recognize each other.
Regarding your assertion that "Nobody seems to acknowledge that empathy isn't real". In my opinion this is an example of ignorance and a great amount of presumption. You would need to have access to every person's inner thoughts and personal experiences in order to come to that conclusion. I have, since childhood, been incredibly empathetic, sympathetic as well. I literally place myself in another's shoes and feel grief, shock, and many other strong emotions. Once I feel these things it's not something that I can simply, "turn off", as some have explained about themselves. It's a process that takes time to overcome, just as trauma and events that affect us all personally (maybe not everyone take time to heal (or we learn to cope).
Many times I have walked into a room and have emotionally and often physically, (stomach pains, nausea, headache) felt the tension or excitement whether I'm among family and friends or a group of people I've never met, large and small. My child started a new school many years ago and during a pta meeting I was able to understand some of the unmentioned tensions between certain people. Not by their actions of something said but by feeling the tension/hurt between people. These are women I had only just met while at this meeting. Fast forward two years and my feelings were accurate. A parents (along with her family) wound up leaving this school (which they'd been attending since their children enrolled in pre-k) and my feelings of her withdrawing were also accurate even though she and I hadn't spoken beyond polite greetings and I had no knowledge of former events that caused this division. During this first meeting I also felt that one particular person was an aggressor/troublemaker, although she wasn't leading the meeting, she wasn't regarded as influential or especially important, nor was she someone the others looked to for leadership. There wasn't any indication, either verbally or physically, that would cause most people to suspect there was even the slightest feelings of animosity. This woman sat among the rest of us and said little, yet somehow I knew that she was poison. Over time I grew more intuitive and learned to guard myself when around her. It was only much later that I learned of the deplorable things she had said and done to people. Several families left the school rather than stay involved, eventually mine included. I say these things because the assertion that empathy, (guilt, etc) is a myth or is somehow relative to an individuals personal experiences is frankly, ludicrous. Your inability to feel these things doesn't change the fact that they exist. I cannot claim to understand how you think or feel and therefore, would be foolish to make the claim that you're completely in control of your disorder, that your feelings don't actually exist and that you are simply trying to manipulate people by shocking them with your claims of psychopathy. Some commenters have stated that, basically, you're not psychopathic, just an ass (the comment was much more brutal but you get the gist). I can't say what you are since I don't know you nor have I read all of your posts but I'm sure you don't like when others disregard your feelings and experiences as though they're/you're irrelevant. I know that empathy exists as do many other emotions, at least in mentally healthy people who take the time and energy to love and comfort others....even when there's nothing for us gain by doing so.